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The ugly the bad and the disgusting
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The ugly the bad and the disgusting A while back some dude was talking about "semen ants" and I slapped him right across the face and then scissor kicked him into a cactus because not only do ants not eat semen even if they did why would you talk about that ? Fun fact , did you know you can find video of a woman shoving a cactus in her snizz on the internet ? Or course you did , because internet . Cut to now . I've been having a bit of an ant problem - you can surely see where this is going . The other night I masturbated (or chivvied the ol wiggly moggly as they say nowhere) and when I was cleaning up I must have missed a drop of semen . Cut to one hour after masturbation , I walk into the bathroom and there's a friggin' swarm of ants all over the semen drop on the end of the bathtub . I nearly vomited all over the place right then and there . Not only DO ants eat semen but they must friggin' love it . I was seriously nauseated . It might be the second worst thing I've seen in my life (the first being a woman giving birth of course) . This might not seem like that big of a thing to most people but semen is disgusting to me . The concept of ejaculating in a woman's mouth is like the worst thing ever to me . The whole spit or swallow debate always makes me cringe because for the love of god why is it even in there ? That ain't in the Bible . And that shit they do in porn where the kiss afterwards ? Pukatronic . So yes , for me seeing a colony of ants eating my splerg was horrible . I slaughtered them like a wolf among lambs , only different . To me this brings up a good safety issue though . Not only are so called facials (if they can so be called) utterly repulsive they can also be dangerous if there's ants around (and there are - always) . This  + this  could = this  If you love a hot load in the face I'm not judging you (but really I am) I'm just saying be careful . Check thoroughly for ants first and if there are any ants in the area refrain from certain sexual activities . In other news according to Layer Cake here are some euphemisms Brits use for a woman being "on" her "period" . No idea if they're real or not but I don't like any of the Americanisms for "having your monthlies" so I feel like we need to see how other countries are doing it . "I've got the painters in" - kind of gross when you think about it . "Arsenal is at home" - Now I don't know if this is just Arsenal because the character is an Arsenal fan or if its always Arsenal . It would be weird if it was the latter . This one I kind of like but it seems like it could easily be confusing while the team or whatever sport you're using is in play . "You wanna bang this Sunday slut ?" "The Vikings are at home ." "Sweet , lets go to the game and then bang in the bathroom at halftime ! That would be so awesome . If the vikes are up lets do anal ." "I'm flying the red flag" - I think we have winner here . Because who doesn't like flags ? No one . And you know what , lots of people have those decorate flags on their houses these days - why not literally fly a red flag ? Double whammy , fly this flag  I wonder what Australians say . Probably something about a coatimundi . Which don't even live in Australia . Australians are crazy . Crazy sexy ! Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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Totally random comment - How many factory reject dildoes can I get for $0.67? Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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Totally random comment - How many factory reject dildoes can I get for $0.67?
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Thanks for ruining my morning, yikes. Any gathering of ants with a population larger than one or two seriously grosses me out...like when you open the medicine cabinet and they have found the one drop of dried cough syrup clinging to the cough syrup bottle and are swarming all over it *shudder*  
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