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| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
Life is a party to which everyone is invited but most can't find the address
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Life is a party to which everyone is invited but most can't find the address So you just keep driving around the neighborhood occasionally thinking "Is that it ? I see people . . ." I think we can all agree that Seinfeld is the funniest show to date (except black people , a black dude told me black people don't like Seinfeld because none of the characters were black) . There was an episode , maybe called "the Move" wherein Jerry teaches George his secret sex move and later when George does it his girlfriend loves it ! Until she finds out that he had to write it on his hand to remember it , then she's OUTRAGED !!! I've always thought that was a weird reaction , I mean I know its a sitcom , but what made me think of this was a woman at work who was pissed because her husband was looking on the internet for tips on how to pleasure her . Why is that bad ? Such as if you had sex with me and I have you the best orgasm ever and then I admitted that I learned how do to whatever I did in Wikihow why would that matter ? Apparently it does to some people , you know I will never understand SOME people . So is the idea that only original sex moves will be tolerated ? Because I'm pretty sure people have been having sex for at least like , 60 years , I'm pretty sure there is nothing original - its all been done before . Woo-hoo-hoo . Or are you supposed to only do stuff that sure it already exists but you thought of it independently without help ? I can't see why that matters but it clearly does . Such as ; Someone - Look what I made ! Someone else - That is awesome ! Someone - I saw it on website ABXYZ . Someone else - Fuck you ! Now it sucks ! I mean this entire blog is plagiarized and people still read it . A couple anyway . Hello you couple people ! Enough about me , how are you doing ? By contrast the show the Last Man on Earth is just an okay show , but what about a show about the last man on earth without herpes ? That seems like it could be interesting . If I was the last man on earth without herpes I wonder how many women would sign up to just bang me and how many would resign themselves to just getting herpes and how many would just wait it out for a new crop of dudes to come of age . If everyone had herpes would it still really be a problem ? Not that I'm advocating for everyone to have herpes but you see what I mean right ? While I was on the treadmill today I wondered how much energy could be produced if all the people exercising in the country could be channeled into something useful . Its criminally inefficient you know to have all these people expending energy and not be collecting it someone - double so when you consider that electricity is being USED merely to power a machine so we can burn energy . Its insane really . According to random website alpha the average time adult people spend exercising is 17 minutes a day (sidenote this makes me feel a lot better about 45 minutes on the treadmill 6 times a week even though it still not enough) and there's about 150 million adults in the US . That's 42.5 million hours a day at 50 watts an hour , that's approximately 2 billion watts AKA two gigawatts , which is the output of a large power plant , which isn't much really . Its nothing to sneeze at sure , but not worth doing . Calls into question the Ricks Must Be Crazy episode but that was an entire planet and all they were doing was powering a car battery . So maybe . Did you now if your could harvest all the lightening strikes in the US in a year it would only power a small town for a day or two ? Lightening is a rare commodity ya'll . If you have a punchbowl full of it save it for your retirement . Did you know that the reason coffee beans have to be picked by hand is because the beans on a plant don't ripen at the same time ? I didn't . So there's a race to see which happens first , genetically engineering a coffee plant that has beans that all mature at the same time or building a machine that can tell the difference and only pick the ripe beans . At which point all the coffee pickers will be out of a job , which seems bad , but I'm given to understand they're treated quite badly so is it really ? I guess they would think so . Its a thorny issue . I was reading an article today wherein a science type postulated that if we went through some kind of dark age regression and had to start over again civilizationwise humanity wouldn't ever progress beyond the Stone Age because all the surface metal is gone , ergo no Bronze Age , no Iron age , etc. This seems plausible , but I feel like technology would just go in another direction . Humans are pretty dang crafty when it comes to ways to be lazier . Or maybe we'd focused on spiritual enlightenment and develop psychic powers so we wouldn't need so much technology . "What sort of creature man’s next successor in the supremacy of the earth is likely to be. We have often heard this debated; but it appears to us that we are ourselves creating our own successors; we are daily adding to the beauty and delicacy of their physical organisation; we are daily giving them greater power and supplying by all sorts of ingenious contrivances that self-regulating, self-acting power which will be to them what intellect has been to the human race. In the course of ages we shall find ourselves the inferior race. Day by day, however, the machines are gaining ground upon us; day by day we are becoming more subservient to them; more men are daily bound down as slaves to tend them, more men are daily devoting the energies of their whole lives to the development of mechanical life. The upshot is simply a question of time, but that the time will come when the machines will hold the real supremacy over the world and its inhabitants is what no person of a truly philosophic mind can for a moment question. War to the death should be instantly proclaimed against them. Every machine of every sort should be destroyed by the well-wisher of his species. Let there be no exceptions made, no quarter shown; let us at once go back to the primeval condition of the race." A dude in 1863 wrote that . I guess things never change really . Also it makes me wonder what the hell were they so worried about in 1863 ? Trains ? Did they think trains were going to take over somehow ? Steamships ? I mean we have robots and computers man , we have shit we should be afraid of , but what in 1863 was freaking people out ? I guess they did invent linoleum then , that's pretty scary . But I'm guessing there was some dude back in 600 BCE who was railing against chariots and how they were going to take over some day . A Million Ways to Die in the West was not very funny , but there was one bit that was amusing where two adults are<b> whining </font></b>about a playing with a hoop and stick "The hoop rots their brains you know , overstimulates their brains so they can't pay attention to anything else" . That's just funny I don't care who you are . In conclusion a samurai armed with a bow and unlimited arrows would totally destroy my boss . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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I was just saying at work the other day that while I don't really care for the concept of a standup desk, and especially not a treadmill desk, I would consider a stationary bike desk. One where I would have to keep pedaling to keep my laptop going. It probably would be a good thing at home too...no netflix streaming unless you were riding the bike to power the Roku.   
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Smarty has the right idea. Gyms should hook up the bikes and treadmills and power themselves. Reading a book about improving your sex life was never frowned upon. The internet must be evil. Maybe I should go ...... Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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i think i could have posted a witty response to this blog if i hadn't spent my youth playing with a hoop.
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