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Hydrogen powered motorcycles and Victoria's Secret underpants  

40Deuce 46M
4633 posts
8/23/2016 5:58 pm

Last Read:
8/24/2016 5:50 pm

Hydrogen powered motorcycles and Victoria's Secret underpants

The first step is deciding what you want to be . And I've decided I want to be classy and wonderful - like a topless Helen Mirren .



Now for step two , devising a plan to become what you want to be . Does anyone have Helen Mirren's number ? Maybe I'll just tweet her .

A lady at work the other day says to me she says "I don't believe in calories" . Which is a weird thing to say . That's like saying you don't believe in temperature . Or weight . It's nonsensical it is ! So I asked her what she meant and she said "I just don't believe in calories" . So I says I says "You don't believe that you can measure the energy in food ?" (I'm not sure that's the exact definition , and even if it was that would only be for dietary calories) And she stared at me for a good 30 seconds and then walked away .

That is NOT what Helen Mirren would have done at all .

I don't speak Spanish at all . I never took any foreign language classes - good work public schooling ! But I can read it better than most people that did take Spanish because when I was in high school I wanted to read the book The Life of Gargantua and of Pantagruel (don't judge me I was in high school I was ! ) and the only copy at the<b> library </font></b>was in Spanish . So I got an English to Spanish dictionary and painfully struggled my way through it . And then out the second part of the book was the English translation . Good work dummy ! You can judge me for that if you want .

You hear about group therapy a lot but why don't you ever hear about group surgery ? That would really cut down on costs - and the medical field is one area that really needs to cut costs . Just stack a bunch of people up on the operating table and start cuttin' .

I thought today was Monday . Its not , yesterday was Monday . I have no recollection of yesterday . Wait , I know I went to the bank because the girl teller had ALL kinds of problems finding my account . "40 , you couldn't call women girls that's pejorative" . Maybe it is , but it doesn't matter because she wasn't a woman she was a girl - she was all of 16 maybe I swear .

Today at work I heard a dude say to his bro "In the end it all comes back to eating pussy" . I don't know what they were talking about but whatever it was he was right . Unless he was talking about sucking dick . I wonder how many straight dudes would let a stranger die rather than suck a dick . Probably a lot . Which is sad .

I referred to a project as a "morass" today and a dude in the meeting flipped out laughing like it was the funniest thing ever . He kept saying "I want MORE ASS !!!" It was the most infantile thing I've seen in quite a while - and I was around an actual infant recently .

Speaking of , have I ever mentioned that dads are hilarious ? They're so useless . It used to annoy me when my friends would say "I have to watch my but you should come over and we can do X" because instead they could never do X because (spoiler alert) need ALL the attention . But now I love it because I know I'll have a good laugh . Last night I was at my buddies and his his flipping out because he has a bag of chips and he says "this isn't candy , you don't want this" and the eyes light up "Candy ?! Candy ! Candy ! Candy !" So the dude gives the the bag and says "See , its not candy" which the promptly dumps out on the couch and starts stomping on . Then the gets involved and its a whole scene . Then the wife shows up and she's all like "Did you know (other ) is wandering around the street naked ?" And I'm laughing my ass off (and for some reason the wives don't like me ! ) .

I don't know when fathers became hilarious inept strawmen instead emotionally distant authority figures but I love it . My friend Jimmy Batts has a good theory about fathers . He's super competent and ambitious and he says its because his dad couldn't do anything so he had to learn stuff . By contrast I am a lazy pile of dough who can't do anything - and he says that's because my dad is awesome and did everything for me . Seems legit .

Remember a few years ago when "the look" to get laid (for dudes) was "straight but gay looking" ? What is now ? And don't give me this shit about "dad bodies" .

I had never heard Ryan Lochte say or seen him do anything until today . Now this whole Brazil snafu makes total sense . I don't say this to be funny or as a slam or anything like that - I think he has some kind of developmental disorder . Honestly .

Hey did you know that I'm re-watching Deadwood right now ?! See that's funny because I talk about it ALL the damn time . One thing I always wonder when watching a "period" piece is what the dollar amounts they're talking about really mean . When Al swindles the dude from Pysch (or actually THINKS he's swindling him) out of $20,000 what does that really mean ? So I looked up and dollar in the 1870 is about 40 bucks today - and I know inflation isn't everything when it comes to these kind of things , but we need something with which to work .

So that's an $800,000 swindle ! Damn Gina . And Alma was fine just writing it off as "an adventure" like it was no big deal . How rich were the people ? And at the Gem it's 7 bucks for anal or $280 in today's dollars which seems pricey BUT they were on the frontier so you have to assume people were getting ripped off on just about everything . Think about all the times you got fucked in the ass for free ! Not even a tip . (insert your own just the tip joke here)

Which makes me wonder in turn what I often wonder about criminal characters on TV shows - are they rich or what ? They don't seem rich . That 20 grand scam seemed like a standard thing for Al and Co. that they did all the time . Is there a lot of overhead in running a crime syndicate ? And that means Saul and Seth spent more than half a million just on the land for their hardware store - if they had that kind of money why did they need the store ?

Here's something interesting to consider , if someone scammed me out of 20k I might be okay , but I might be ruined - like homeless on the street ruined . But if someone gave me 20k it wouldn't really change my life that much . Isn't that weird ? I'm not saying I would turn down $20,000 but it wouldn't "make" me you know ? Ponder that why don't you ?

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

Teddy Roosevelt said that (allegedly) . I may be a cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat but I think I'm okay with that . Who cares what someone called "Teddy" thinks ?

If you think there's NOT tons of porn with chicks humping Teddy bears you're wrong . Dead wrong .


Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.


superbjversion2 68F  
24388 posts
8/23/2016 6:26 pm

You may talk about Deadwood all the time but you don't blog about it all the time. Thank you for that.

As for the 20K ... still pondering.

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!


40Deuce replies on 8/24/2016 5:52 pm:
Hmm , I feel like I've mentioned Deadwood in the last several blogs , but as we know you just read the titles anyway - and I love you for it

tickles4us 62M
7262 posts
8/23/2016 6:42 pm

Hey what about those motorcycles?

I'm always wondering about the value of the dollar on those shows too and have even looked it up once or twice.

Vive La Difference


40Deuce replies on 8/24/2016 5:52 pm:
They run on hydrogen - what more you need to know ?

smartasswoman 66F  
35813 posts
8/23/2016 7:26 pm

Nice Helen Mirren pic. I assume you saw the old video that's been circulating this week - of her being interviewed by a sexist pig? "Do you have trouble being taken seriously as an actress because...[pause]...you know...[downward look at her breasts].

$20K would probably make a huge difference to some poor person who's buried under that much in credit card debt. Life changing, maybe not, but it would take a lot of pressure off.


40Deuce replies on 8/24/2016 5:53 pm:
I have not - how old ? Like back when everyone was a sexist pig or like 4 years ago ?

justskin1 72M
13175 posts
8/23/2016 8:47 pm

Thanks for the pic of Helen Mirren. I do hope you noticed that she is bottomless too. Speaking of bottoms, I would love to see that same view from the behind as I am truly an ass and back man.
Interesting points you have.


If you see me in the real world, come say "Hi Justskin."

I always behave. Preferably not well.


40Deuce replies on 8/24/2016 5:54 pm:
No problem

stars_light4U 66F
3808 posts
8/23/2016 9:43 pm

I just want to tell you that I read your blog from start to finish and found it very interesting. I didn't skip any words, parts, or paragraphs! !
Yours is the only blog that I totally enjoyed. Thank you. ..!! 😊


Looking forward to a good year ahead!!

Stars_light4U


40Deuce replies on 8/24/2016 5:55 pm:
I'm glad you enjoyed every part of the blog - it cuts down on waste

bipolybabe69 62F
284 posts
8/24/2016 11:44 am

Straight but gay looking still rocks (for me). But consider my age and the age you wish to attract.

Also cowboy. And rock star. But you need to actually be one of those.

Or any character played by David Duchovny: "Scruffy, tortured writer who gets a lot of tail" look.


40Deuce replies on 8/24/2016 5:56 pm:
So not Duchovny in Connie and Carla - got it

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