Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
Your stegosaurus is filthy
|
Your stegosaurus is filthy Everyone is judging you . Don't worry though , I can sell you some dinosaur shampoo for $55 . Remember that time Hula Steve and Donna Slicks and I got drunk on Steel Reserve 211 and we did the filthy stegosaurus in the basement at Aunt Betty's house ? I couldn't get the scent of mango out of my balls for weeks .  When you're done with your work for the say and you roll back in your office chair to get ready to leave do you ever shout "Am I alive ?!" And if so does anyone ever answer you ? And if not does that mean that you probably aren't ? If you don't work in an office chair (excluding people in offices with standing desks) that probably means you either make less money than me or a lot more . Kyle Kinane (who I find quite funny) said in his first comedy special that shows where people have jobs where they actually do work is the pornography of the modern world - trucks and loggers and fisherman and such - we are fascinated by people who do real work for a living . They get a paycheck just like me ! It's crazy ! The other day this fella says to me "I'm not worried about who you pretend to be . I'm too busy inciting you to be the savage hypocrite you really are ." Which is a weird thing to say for several reasons , not the least of which is that I don't feel like I ever pretend to be anything other than a savage hypocrite . Which I think we can all agree would be a pretty good FriendFinder-x screenname . Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and as I do every year I wonder if there's measurable move fucking going on than usual . Do they even celebrate Valentine's Day in other countries ? Valentine's Day is the celebration of love in all it's forms though , not just penetration - so this Valentine's day how about showing your love in another way . Like leaving your partner alone for a god damn minute . Speaking of fucking did I miss a memo ? Can you say fuck on basic cable now ? The last episode of Sunny (which was pretty good) included this piece of dialog without any censoring "I think you're fucking yourself in the ass with a dildo chair" along with a bunch of "cocksuckers" and "cunts" . You expect that on premium channels but on basic cable ? It is just anything goes now ? When did that happen ? And when is the hardcore nudity going to follow ? I'm not talking about some ass flashing or sideboob - I mean the real deal (with Bill McNeal , RIP Phil Hartman) . Tired of all those frou-frou , girly Valentine's day gifts ? Ready to say that you're not some diamond-loving , chocolate-scarfing feminine flower? Then how about a bouquet of circular saw blades ? Just like every<b> cowboy </font></b>sings a sad , sad song , these roses are all thorn . You know what would be good right now ? Some ice cream and strawberries . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
||||
|
Addendum , Chavo Guerrero Sr. passed away , please listen to the Mountain Goats song "the Legend of Chavo Guerrero" to honor his sort of honorable life Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
| |||
|
For the record . . . I wash my stegosaurus thoroughly everyday.  When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
| |||
|
One of my friends told me that ice cream has like, 50 times the cholesterol of a doughnut. Nevertheless I'll join you for the ice cream and strawberries.  
| |||
|
I suppose that sometimes we must get off the chair to produce something other than waste paper... 
| |||
|
Yes... If you really loved her you'd give her a whole day away from you. That'd make the day very special indeed! 
| |||
|
wow, I so want to call myself the savagehypocrite. but it seems hypocritical. You cannot conceive the many without the one.
| |||
|
I suppose that sometimes we must get off the chair to produce something other than waste paper... Blog on!
|
Become a member to create a blog
