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A Politician Passed Away And Visited The Afterlife, But Hell Wasn't Quite What She Expected.
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A Politician Passed Away And Visited The Afterlife, But Hell Wasn't Quite What She Expected. While walking down the street one day, a presidential candidate was tragically hit by a car and died. Her soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you." "No problem, just let me in," says the politician. "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity." "Really?, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the politician. "I'm sorry, but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter her to the elevator and she goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and she finds herself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all her friends and other politicians who had worked with her. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is having a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are all having such a good time that before the politician realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives her a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for her, "Now it's time to visit heaven..." So, 24 hours passed with the politician joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and<b> singing. </font></b>They have a good time and, before she realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. "Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity!' The politician reflects for a minute, then she answers  quot;Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."So St. Peter her to the elevator and she goes down, down, down to hell... Now the doors of the elevator open and she's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. She sees all her friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls to the ground. The devil comes over to her and puts his arm around her shoulders. "I don't understand," stammers the politician. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?" The devil smiles at her and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning, Today, you voted!' I sent an Angel to watch over you last night, it returned in a hurry. I asked why, it said "Angels can't watch porn." Thanks for fucking traumatizing my fucking Angel! Don't bother trying to figure me out. Not even the little voices in my head understand me. It's pointless! |
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That's pretty good. Hope your angel isn't traumatized anymore. Embrace the suck
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