Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > rm_Quixy101 > Gravity |
Are you a Player??
|
Are you a Player?? In idle conversation with some good friends the other day...I was jokingly referred to as a "Player"...now to me that has always had bad connotations...so I went to the world's best source of knowledge...lol...Wikipedia...here's what it says: "a person who pursues a number of different social and sexual partners simultaneously" It goes on further to state.... "Redirected from Player (dating)) "Promiscuous" redirects here. For other uses, see Promiscuous (disambiguation). In human sexual behavior, promiscuity denotes casual sex between many partners.[1] Behavior includes sex with partners who are not one's spouse. It is common in some animal species. In biology, incidents of promiscuity are usually called extra-pair copulations. Uh huh.... Well I kinda like the biology reference..."extra-pair copulations"...lol. Anyway...it got me to thinking...if I am in a monogamous relationship, then anyone else I have sex with during that relationship makes me a player...hmmm...but what if I am not in a monogamous relationship? Does that make me just an "extra-pair copulator"?? Lmao. It all seems quite contrite...I mean by strict definition I have been a "player" for years...but seriously I never considered myself to be such a person. I always thought it was a bad thing...sneaking around behind someone or some peoples backs. But what if my partner(s) know I see other women?? Is that different?? Back to my esteemed colleagues from the store...in one person's belief, "yes it does!" In another's "no, it doesn't " and in the third case..."depends..." Sigh....so as usual there are many definitions on the subject. So here's my definition...you can be either a "good" player or a "bad" one. And here's the difference...a "Good" player is one who sees multiple women, but all or most of the women know about it. Whether they know names or such is imaterial...as long as they know there are others, then they know. If they have an issue they can speak up or remain silent...though I wouldn't reccomend the second course of action. I think if it bothers you you should say something. No sense stewing about it and getting more upset. Come right out and say "I don't like this ", or "I'd prefer you didn't" or some such thing. I have had women say that to me and I have respected them greatly...and depending on the woman, I have either stopped seeing others or broken it off with that woman. Now if you don't want to say anything because you fear it might lead to a break up(or down) then you have to decide how important the guy is to you...are you willing to share, etc? The answer to that question will tell you the answer to the whole relationship, really. The second type of "player" is the bad one. This is the sneaky guy who has multiple relationships going but hides them all from the other ones. Basically, to me, this is being dishonest. I mean really...its like sneaking around on your spouse...not a good thing really. I know there are circumstances, etc...but down to it, its really not fair. I would not be comfortable being a player in this sense. Actually...truth be known...if I were made to choose I would. Not sure who, but I would decide. My goal originally in coming to this site was to find ONE woman who I could be with to satisfy my<b> sexual needs. </font></b>Well so far that hasn't really worked out like I wanted. So I have a couple that I see and that seems to work for everyone... So I guess that makes me a Player...sigh...guilty as charged...but so long as the women don't mind, who am I to complain.  So tell me...what do you think?? Is it ok to be a "player" when everyone is ok with it...or should I just be ashamed of myself and settle on one?? Here's you chance... |
||||
|
While I believe one is best, it is hard to find. Oh, sure, if I wanted one night stands, I'm sure I could have several in a week, but that's not me. I want one for me and no one else. And no, I don't think you are a "player" in my understanding of the word. "Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened." 
| |||
|
I think that as long as everyone knows what is going on it is okay. I also prefer one man at a time. No that doesn't mean more then one in a day. But like you said that is hard to find. Debbie
| |||
5/27/2009 2:08 pm |
My definition of a 'player' is one who can't commit and plays around with whomever he/she wants in spite of his circumstances... good or bad...if he/she is playing with or without consent is still a 'player'....I realized I couldn't do this...I am strictly one woman/one man, no matter how I justified my past actions.... I prefer a committed, profound and complete relationship where both partners are for one another ONLY! TASTE LIFE IN ALL IT'S FLAVOUR
|
Become a member to create a blog
