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Swinger Party Host’s Nose Broken After Guest Couldn’t Find Trousers
Swinger Party Host’s Nose Broken After Guest Couldn’t Find Trousers A simple set of lockers – or even a rack of baskets – would have avoided nearly U.S.$7,000 in medical fees and a multitude of troubles for a Lancashire, England IT professional. Folks who have never attended a swing party might not be aware of a small-but-significant concern: By such parties’ very nature, guests are going to spent considerable time away from their clothes and wallets and other valuables. Some bring little pouches for condoms, lube, and anything else they might need: Swing parties might be one of the few places on the planet where fanny packs are not sneered at, although readers may wish to translate “fanny” into whatever appropriate terminology is used in their location. All that is a longwinded way of saying street clothes and the rest have to be stored somewhere. Larger clubs often provide lockers or locked baskets for their guests, with keys on loops that can be worn around the wrist or ankle, as is a guest’s wont. Smaller events usually rely on an organizer or worker to guard a room or pile of personal items. The latter system usually works out reasonably well. By “reasonably” it means that guests don’t mind a few disappearing items which are genuinely lost. In-home party hosts often wind up with a collection of undergarments or unopened condoms scattered around. The former are usually held in hopes that guest will call and claim them, while the latter are usually placed in communal condom jars. But everyone once in a while something goes missing which is so significant that its loss has to be resolved immediately. This was the case for Thomas Wardrop, an IT professional who, according to the UK’s Sun newspaper, got himself good and racked up on booze, cocaine, and play during an all-night orgy, only to realize in the harsh light of morning that he couldn’t find his trousers. Wardrop had every reason to be concerned: His plight, per an article in the Sun titled “IT boss battered swingers party host when he couldn't find his trousers after all-night orgy” meant that he’d be showing up to his home without his pants. This would doubtless have been confusing to his wife, who hadn’t attended the party with him. Seems the woman Wardrop had brought to the party wasn’t his spouse. Upon realizing his dilemma, Wardrop took actions which must, in his altered state, have seemed perfectly conducive to apparel-finding: He began punching and head-butting his host, breaking his host’s nose in the process. In court, the party host presented a medical bill for 4,800 pounds – more than U.S. $6.800. The host also claimed that he and his wife had to redecorate after the party in order to clean the bloodstained floor and furniture. For want of a pair of trousers, Wardrop’s wife left him, the courts handed him a 21-month jail sentence suspended for two years with 250 hours of unpaid work, levied a 2500-pound fine (nearly U.S. $3,600) and a slapped him with a 12-month driving ban. He also, according to reports, managed to rack up 50,000 pounds (U.S. $71,300) in credit card debt, although the article didn’t say whether this was due to lost wages, divorce costs, or both. Side note: There’s a lovely apparel store close to Wardop’s home in Buckshaw Village, Lancashire called Nigel Clare. A decent pair of men’s trousers will run between 70 pounds and 140 pounds – and the traditional English reserve means that while shopping in one’s pajama bottoms might not go unnoticed, it probably would go uncommented on. Another 70 pounds fetches a lovely “reet” men’s shoulder bag. Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic |
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an expensive piece of tail, for sure
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Well, the host may set the tone, but ultimately the guests do make -- or break -- the party, don't they... Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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an expensive piece of tail, for sure Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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Or coked up people... A smart move! Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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That... is one very understanding wife! (No, no: The history of a couple can go a long way toward establishing trust... I do understand...) Well commented! Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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I love it! This could have happened in a trailer park! But it didn't- it happened to an IT bigshot! All those years spent in the cellar surviving on snack foods and staring at a computer and he still has no social skills! Amazing! I wonder if he was a member of this site..."Short tempered dom seeks hard nosed sub- male or female" Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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*Sigh* The innocent have all the luck, don't they... Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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I love it! This could have happened in a trailer park! But it didn't- it happened to an IT bigshot! All those years spent in the cellar surviving on snack foods and staring at a computer and he still has no social skills! Amazing! I wonder if he was a member of this site..."Short tempered dom seeks hard nosed sub- male or female" Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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What an amateur!!! LMAO!!!!!!! WITHOUT PASSION LIFE IS NOTHING
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All that comes to mind is... dumb ass". Find pleasure in giving pleasure
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What goes around comes around. I supposed he got what he deserved. I was informed never to say fanny-pack in the UK. I asked my son-in-law what I should call it and he said it is a bum-bag. Well I don't think that sounds any nicer at all. Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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What an amateur!!! LMAO!!!!!!! Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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I'm wondering if there's a connection to the 50,000 pound credit card bill and the missing pants, as in, his wallet was in the missing pants. I nearly punched a guy in the ear when I thought he stole my lube bag at a swingers birthday party. It wasn't him. Imagine if rather than being stoned, I'd been drinking, I could be in jail now. Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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All that comes to mind is... dumb ass". Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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The club that I have been to here in San Diego doesn't allow people to use their own locks. You use their lockers and their locks, and they keep the key involved. That way, you cannot leave without them knowing, since you have to go to the front desk to retrieve the key to your locker. In a private house, I would think that it would have to be small enough that you would know if someone took your pants or clothes. hm, Kitkat The observant make the best lovers, I may not do right, but I do write, I have bliss, joy, and happiness in my life, Kitkat Come check out my blog KItkat1415 check out this post by me Adventures In Body Grooming #39 April Topic Link: What Lies Beneath If April Showers Oh Bloody Hell What Kind Of Weather Turns Me On Bloggers Symposium 40
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The club that I have been to here in San Diego doesn't allow people to use their own locks. You use their lockers and their locks, and they keep the key involved. That way, you cannot leave without them knowing, since you have to go to the front desk to retrieve the key to your locker. In a private house, I would think that it would have to be small enough that you would know if someone took your pants or clothes. hm, Kitkat Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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To use a wonderful English phrase: What a wanker!!! LOL I have empathy though. I would hate for such a thing to happen to me. I have loved the comments by Darling Annette and Kzoo. I also loved your puns with the word "nose." Thanks for sharing such an educational story. Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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Pretty costly to say the least. Since you been posting about swingers and way of life I want to thank you for a great insight into this world. I had no idea humor. One good reason to visit others people blog you can learn a lot hugssssssssss V ty Become a blog watcher sweet_vm
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The Lancashire man is clearly an idiot. He could even returned home trouserless saying to his wife that he had an accident in his trousers. He may have just have got away with it particularly if he could embellish his lie with lots of convincing detail! When I hosted sex parties, I amassed an amazing collection of things, but unfortunately nothing valuable to sell!
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Karma and a well-developed legal system... My pleasure! Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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Pretty costly to say the least. Since you been posting about swingers and way of life I want to thank you for a great insight into this world. I had no idea humor. One good reason to visit others people blog you can learn a lot hugssssssssss V ty I don't generally write about myself, and the topic lets me give the blog some focus. If I didn't have a theme, I'd be dealing with blank "pages" -- and I can't think of anything scarier, except perhaps spiderbears. Yeah, spiderbears are scarier than blank pages. Thank you! Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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The Lancashire man is clearly an idiot. He could even returned home trouserless saying to his wife that he had an accident in his trousers. He may have just have got away with it particularly if he could embellish his lie with lots of convincing detail! When I hosted sex parties, I amassed an amazing collection of things, but unfortunately nothing valuable to sell! A man is in a bar, tying one on in a serious way. All of a sudden his stomach rebels and he vomits all over his shirt. Immediately he panics. "Oh, no!" He cries out. "I told my wife I wouldn't let drink get the better of me anymore, and once she sees this she'll know I was on a bender." "Relax," says the bartender. "Here's what you do. Take a ten-dollar bill and put it in your shirt pocket. When your wife sees you, you can tell her that you were in a bar but not drinking excessively when some guy came over and threw up on you." The man is very grateful for this advice, and he leaves. When he gets home, his wife starts to yell, but he stops her. "It's okay, honey," he says. "I was in a bar having just one drink when some guy came over and threw up on my shirt. He was so sorry that he gave me ten dollars --" and here the man patted his shirt pocket -- "for the dry cleaning." The wife looks inside the shirt pocket. "But there's a 20 in here," she says. "Oh yeah, he also shit in my pants." Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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1. In the home of some equally obliterated party participant. 2. They would now, as they are especially notorious pants. Think "little blue dress" and a certain presidential intern. Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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What was karma's role regarding the host? Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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Heh... reminds me of an old joke. A man is in a bar, tying one on in a serious way. All of a sudden his stomach rebels and he vomits all over his shirt. Immediately he panics. "Oh, no!" He cries out. "I told my wife I wouldn't let drink get the better of me anymore, and once she sees this she'll know I was on a bender." "Relax," says the bartender. "Here's what you do. Take a ten-dollar bill and put it in your shirt pocket. When your wife sees you, you can tell her that you were in a bar but not drinking excessively when some guy came over and threw up on you." The man is very grateful for this advice, and he leaves. When he gets home, his wife starts to yell, but he stops her. "It's okay, honey," he says. "I was in a bar having just one drink when some guy came over and threw up on my shirt. He was so sorry that he gave me ten dollars --" and here the man patted his shirt pocket -- "for the dry cleaning." The wife looks inside the shirt pocket. "But there's a 20 in here," she says. "Oh yeah, he also shit in my pants."
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