Reset Password
If you've forgotten your password, you can enter your email address below. An email will then be sent with a link to set up a new password.
Cancel
Reset Link Sent
If the email is registered with our site, you will receive an email with instructions to reset your password. Password reset link sent to:
Check your email and enter the confirmation code:
Don't see the email?
  • Resend Confirmation Link
  • Start Over
Close
If you have any questions, please contact Customer Service

newspaper ad...  

toothysmile 58M
9181 posts
11/5/2011 6:08 am

Last Read:
1/18/2022 1:27 pm

newspaper ad...

newspaper ad...

No, I mean really... Suppose you wanted to run an ad in the paper... to find your next sexual partner. Just sex, not your life partner. (yeah, back in the days when this place didn't exist!)... What would you write?

I think mine would be something like this:

in the men-seeking-women section...
"Serious oral addict seeks like-minded maniac to indulge for hours upon hours of mutual pleasure."

Alright. Your turn. Let me hear it. Be precise. Be concise. And be funny. Which words would you use?


.
.
.




rm_loveslilies 57F
36204 posts
11/5/2011 9:27 am

women seeking men section:
submissive woman with a brat side seeking an intelligent, humorous, sensual, creative, romantic and must be an experienced dom to get her butt under control but it must be done in a fun way.
must have own equipment.

hows that

If Love Is Not The Answer,
Then I Misunderstood The Question


Opus_of_a_liar 47F

11/6/2011 1:13 am

In the miscellaneous section...

Imagination wanted. Must run on endless source of energy and not batteries.


sandpearls 55F
1454 posts
11/6/2011 2:05 am

Water loving man/woman/couple needed for underwater breathing sessions


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/6/2011 3:56 am

    Quoting  :

curioustap
love the 'great stamina' bit... lol... i suppose less worthy interested parties needn't apply, lol...
thanks dear curious.
kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/6/2011 3:58 am

    Quoting rm_loveslilies:
    women seeking men section:
    submissive woman with a brat side seeking an intelligent, humorous, sensual, creative, romantic and must be an experienced dom to get her butt under control but it must be done in a fun way.
    must have own equipment.

    hows that
loveslilies
now, where did i put my tool box?... lol... ok, so your favorites need to have their own equipment. and a few other things... clearly spelled out, i love it.
thanks
kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/6/2011 4:01 am

    Quoting  :

NaughtyBlonde78
blondie!
it's good to see you here!...
and yes, i sooo know what you are talking about the sand in the cracks... greece has thousands of miles of sandy beaches...
now, come to think of it... 13 degrees north... that's not really where you are, is it? are you sending the poor honry toads on a wild goose chase?... lol...

kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/6/2011 4:04 am

    Quoting Opus_of_a_liar:
    In the miscellaneous section...

    Imagination wanted. Must run on endless source of energy and not batteries.
Opus_of_a_liar
i so enjoy seeing your kinky side my dear ms. opus.
now... perhaps you should be a little more specific about the 'imagination' bit... unless you want to find new uses for your household appliances... lol...

ευχαριστώ Κα Όπους!
Φιλιά


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/6/2011 4:07 am

    Quoting sandpearls:
    Water loving man/woman/couple needed for underwater breathing sessions

let me guess... you are a scuba-diving instructor...
excellent ad though... you give a hint of what you enjoy in a playful way. i like it.
filia.


Opus_of_a_liar 47F

11/6/2011 10:43 am

    Quoting toothysmile:

    Opus_of_a_liar
    i so enjoy seeing your kinky side my dear ms. opus.
    now... perhaps you should be a little more specific about the 'imagination' bit... unless you want to find new uses for your household appliances... lol...

    ευχαριστώ Κα Όπους!
    Φιλιά

You blog is not big enough for me to be more specific. Sorry.

I will not take my appliances as lovers either. I am not that bad.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/8/2011 1:37 pm

    Quoting Opus_of_a_liar:
    You blog is not big enough for me to be more specific. Sorry.

    I will not take my appliances as lovers either. I am not that bad.
Opus_of_a_liar
i'm sorry if i offended you... and yes, my dear ms. opus... i never thought of you as bad.
although i do like your naughty side
hugs.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/8/2011 1:40 pm

    Quoting  :

gemstone_eyes
oh... i'm sure he is practically racing to find you...
you seem to know exactly what you want my dear gem... perhaps you don't need to place an ad after all
kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/8/2011 1:46 pm

    Quoting  :

menteluminosa
oh my... i am sooo happy to see you here again... i am very tempted to tease you but i will refrain... for now...
i will however give you what lazarus received upon his return from the dead: a very thorough sponge bath, he must have been smelly as hell!

now, as to your ad... manners can be taught in several ways... seaweed can be easily provided... my only question is: how do you propose to pay for the bold type in your ad?

besos+


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/8/2011 2:51 pm

menteluminosa
ok, a pomegranates-and-salt sponge bath it is then...
very good now, your payment plan is approved. please follow me to the editor-in-chief's office for a few clarifications concerning your ad...

besos+


SoulsCompass 59M

11/8/2011 5:02 pm

"If you like pina colada's.. " {{ giggling }}


whipedstrwbry 59F
4148 posts
11/8/2011 5:12 pm

In the "Knowing what you need is priceless" section)
Well trained old school cum loving pain slut ISO her well endowed, extremely smart, strict, Dom. Experienced in giving deep nasty orals, anals, DPs,fisting, paddling, using and abusing,and very into dirty talking is a +.Knowing how to tie 13+ knots with a 5mm jute, and not losing the cage’s keys is a ++. Well I guess the rest would be VB )))


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/8/2011 5:34 pm

    Quoting SoulsCompass:
    "If you like pina colada's.. " {{ giggling }}
SoulsCompass
...and getting caught in the rain.
If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
I'm the lady you've looked for, write to me, and escape"

damn...
you know me too well!

kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/8/2011 5:39 pm

    Quoting whipedstrwbry:
    In the "Knowing what you need is priceless" section)
    Well trained old school cum loving pain slut ISO her well endowed, extremely smart, strict, Dom. Experienced in giving deep nasty orals, anals, DPs,fisting, paddling, using and abusing,and very into dirty talking is a +.Knowing how to tie 13+ knots with a 5mm jute, and not losing the cage’s keys is a ++. Well I guess the rest would be VB )))


now that's a mighty tall order ms. strwbry!...
why do i get the feeling you have someone very particular in mind?...
you know i'm really tempted to place this ad in the paper and refer them to you... lol.
now, if i can make a claim... i have never lost a key! ...



thank you.

kisses.


PerpetoMobile13 67F
3218 posts
11/9/2011 12:32 am


In the section"Around the world":

Orgasmatronic woman who doesn't subscribe to the "sit-back-and-cross-your-fingers" formula for achieving sexual nirvana, on worldwild search for Dare Davil:

Sometimes he's pretty funny
other times he's very sad.
Occasionally he's brilliant
but mostly he's just plain bad.
Every once in a great while
on days like yesterday
with inspiration from who knows where
deep inside he finds those words.
The words that make my jaw drop to the floor
and cause my head to shake left, then right and back again
as I wonder... Why Mr. Dare Davil oh why?



~~I may be no better, but at least I am different.~~ Jean-Jacques Rousseau

~~Stop by my adventure land ~♑~Reambiguating the world~♑~


sexymermaid6956 70F
26383 posts
11/10/2011 5:23 am

come on toothy...just look at your pic in this post
woman seeking toothys lovely lips

seeks those luscious lips to nipple on all night long ...

[]

Seduce my mind and my body


sonic_n_sideshow 51M/53F
15101 posts
11/10/2011 10:11 am

Female seeking the lost art of fingerbanging. Must be deliberate and confident with fingers and hands. Must also be willing to fall asleep in the wet spot, as there will really be no dry spots left.

I am a celebration of willful chaos and a hugger.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/11/2011 12:39 am

    Quoting PerpetoMobile13:

    In the section"Around the world":

    Orgasmatronic woman who doesn't subscribe to the "sit-back-and-cross-your-fingers" formula for achieving sexual nirvana, on worldwild search for Dare Davil:

    Sometimes he's pretty funny
    other times he's very sad.
    Occasionally he's brilliant
    but mostly he's just plain bad.
    Every once in a great while
    on days like yesterday
    with inspiration from who knows where
    deep inside he finds those words.
    The words that make my jaw drop to the floor
    and cause my head to shake left, then right and back again
    as I wonder... Why Mr. Dare Davil oh why?



why mr. daredevil?... are you asking me?... lol...
i think someone might answer that ad...
dare devil seeks orgasmatronic woman...

kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/11/2011 12:41 am

    Quoting  :

HotSoccerMom
first let me say that no left back of your caliber can be considered a pawg... the rest stands.
secondly... thank you for coming by. wellcome to my blog.

kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/11/2011 12:43 am

    Quoting  :

Ninner1998
you forgot to say: apply at [blog Ninner1998]
definitely to the point... i'm sure you'll get millions of interested parties...

thanks for coming by ninner, good to see you here.
kisses


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/11/2011 12:46 am

    Quoting sexymermaid6956:
    come on toothy...just look at your pic in this post
    woman seeking toothys lovely lips

    seeks those luscious lips to nipple on all night long ...

aww... thank you my dear mermaid...
so... you want my lips?...

kisses.


toothysmile 58M
16539 posts
11/11/2011 12:49 am

    Quoting sonic_n_sideshow:
    Female seeking the lost art of fingerbanging. Must be deliberate and confident with fingers and hands. Must also be willing to fall asleep in the wet spot, as there will really be no dry spots left.

fingers! now there is something no one has mentioned yet. quick question: does that prohibit the use of the tongue?...

and the wet spot... yup. can't forget about that. very considerate of you to metnion it. always good to give a... 'heads up'...

thank you for stopping by and wellcome to 'blog toothysmile the bright side of the moon]
kisses.


Become a member to create a blog