Shed the fear
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Posted:Oct 24, 2010 7:40 am
Last Updated:Jun 4, 2016 8:58 am
20819 Views
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I was reading an article on the vueweekly website discussing an interview with Jennifer Skrukwa titled "shed the fear". Jennifer is a sex activist and founder of Libido events in Vancouver BC. someone that Deni & I have had the extreme pleasure to meet and attend her classes. Look her up, her blog spot always has something interesting on it, and if you can make it to one of her events or classes we highly recommend you do so!
Anyway, the article talked about shedding the fear that has been associated with sex and sexuality. I like the idea of "shed the fear", if only it were that easy.
The problem, the real source of the issue, is not the fear itself, but its source. That source is disinformation and control tactics that have been force fed to humanity and spread about the globe like the diseases those same people claim will ruin anyone that dares to be so unwise as to actually enjoy sex. But it wasn’t always so. Looking at some native North American societies in the recent history, there were communities that believed that a guest in ones home should never sleep alone if given opportunity for company. Whether it was an eligible young woman of the tribe, the hosts’ , or even his wife that was offered up was beside the point, it wasn’t looked at as wrong or immoral, it was common courtesy (as well as smart breeding, deepening the gene pool as it were). Some European societies displayed similar traditions and attitudes, but more commonly sex was something people did for fun & it wasn’t looked down upon or required to be hidden behind closed doors. Granted, having it on the lords table was looked at as being in bad taste,… Then along come new views, new Gods, new forms of morality telling us that reveling in our animal selves is wrong. That sex is not something to be enjoyed but to be held sacred, kept quiet, and limited only to those to whom we are married. In some instances it was viewed as a sin to even have sex for any other purpose than procreation. I mean, can you imagine having sex fully clothed through a bed sheet with a hole in it? Sexuality has always been seen as the purest form of joy, of total pleasure where our civilized selves touch our animal selves, letting go of the bindings forced upon us from birth and reveling in the moment. Interestingly enough, while many of those institutions that came up with those moral bindings will say that letting go is against God and is a sin, the reality is in that very moment we are closest to our true selves, and therefore closer to God. Of course that loosens the yoke of control and those institutions that exist because of that yoke cannot have us running about willy-nilly communing with THEIR God without their help. Can you imagine??? Now that people are growing away from antiquated ideals and belief systems, there are other forms of control being forced upon us as well. Disease, unwanted pregnancies, the rampant spread of infections,… At it’s root, potential threats all, but still a form of imposed control. This is made obvious by the massive outpouring of ignorance and hate when discussing something , say like a woman that enjoys swinging. “Dirty disease spreading ” pretty much sums up what I have seen said before. While I’m sure the people saying such things believe what they say, I also believe they in turn wonder what it’s like not to care. To be able to truly enjoy ones sexuality, revel in the variety of potentials, and let go of the bindings that hold them back. Humans are capable of immense pleasure and joy, it seems to be an immeasurable shame that many of us are unable to attain that state because we feel shame over it. Shame that comes from what we have been brow beaten into believing is moral and immoral, as if the very act of sex itself is not pure joy, but pure sin, and is an affront to the very God that allegedly made us this way. Now, after centuries of imposed morality (oft times violently), half truths, and outright lies, people are finally starting to step out of the shade and into the light. More and more people are learning that sex is not evil, or dirty, or wrong. As those people mature, experiment with sex, and learn the true joys of reveling in our basic instincts, they will in turn enable their own to understand (hopefully in the proper manner of course). Over the course of a few generations people have grown up sexually by leaps and bounds, in a couple more generations sexuality will be more openly understood and accepted as it should be.
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So far as the meets go,...
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Posted:Oct 21, 2010 3:08 am
Last Updated:Oct 21, 2010 3:25 am
19699 Views
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Due to the fact that we only get one freeSaturday a month and are desiring to do something with it other than the meets (not that we dont enjoy seeing you people, we'd just like to do something else once in a while, like go to N.H. for the 1st time in over 2 years for instance). There has been a less than stellar show of interest in recent months as it is (nevermind the total absence of attendees from the rock wich has forced me to tank the Oak Harbor Meet and Greet group for good), we're just not getting the numbers these days to justify giving up our only free weekend. So! Instead of tanking the meet alltogether we have elected to make some changes! We have officialy moved the meets from the 2nd Sat of the month to the 1st Sunday of the month. The date may help some of our parental units get out as it's much easier to find a sitter for a Sunday night than a Friday or Saturday. However, it also creates an issue with holding them at our usual venue of Max Dales as they close eary on Sunday. So, we have moved across the road to the bowling alley lounge.
New and not really improved date/location for the Mt. vernon dinner Meet: 1st Sunday of every month, 7pm till whenever, in the lounge at Riverside Lanes in Mt. Vernon. Dates and info will be posted on the Bellingham Meet and Greet group message board as always.
See ya there!
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Meet & greets????
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Posted:Jul 28, 2010 3:28 am
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2024 1:41 am
17046 Views
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OK, so I know a few of you locals are wondering, and I'll be honest, so am I. As of now we are doing better and may be in a prper mindset for getting back to the meets, but I'm not making any plans for August just yet.
As it stands the 2nd Saturday of August is also the annual Oak harbor car show. I never miss that show, and so far this year I have had to miss every other event in the are due to work &/o funding getting in the frkkin way. However, I will be working the night before, have to get up early to get the truck and car to the show, set up, spend all day at the show, and after last year I can tell you I wont be in any condition for the M&G that evening. Also, IF things go as planned we'll be leaving Sunday morning for a much needed break, departing for parts unknown for a few days mini-vacation & to celebrate Jamies B-day.
So, September is looking better for the return of the Mt.Vernon dinner meets. Till then, yanno where to find us.
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Queer politics
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Posted:Jun 27, 2010 6:49 am
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2024 1:41 am
16410 Views
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OK, just FYI, the 1st half of this post was lifted from Jennifer of Libido Events in Vancouver BC (Google her, she's an amazing woman, a tireless sex activist, and we have been lucky enough to meet her and attend one of her classes). I read her posting and I wrote her a long reply which is on here in blue. Again, the 1st half of this was lifted from jennifer, it, as well as my reply, bring up a few items I thought would be both entertaining, provocative, and informative to folks. ______________________________________
Queer Politics
BEWARE This is part rant, and part questioning. You've been warned. Input from other people is often what it takes for me to understand concepts foreign to me. I subscribe to a number of different message boards and forums for sex and alternative lifestyles to assist me in my growth of understanding. New ideas are constantly tossed around and for the most part, I can wrap my mind around them with relative ease. But lately, there is something that I seem unable to comprehend, despite investing much time and patience to learn more about it. It's about majorities and minorities in life, and more specifically in sex culture. I see this often and it baffles me to no end. And yes, I do understand the whole privilege thing. What's happening is one of the minority groups in our community, the *queer population is demanding their own events. Exclusive space and parties just for them. And it's been proposed that they can exclude anyone they don't know, or who does not fit into their definition of what queer is. Now the majority is upset. This would include the (perceived) heterosexuals, cissexuals, bi sexuals, outlaws, intersexed, androgynous, trans and all those who prefer to not be labeled. And, those who fear not being accepted by this exclusive feeling queer group. How is it that a group (that is a minority one none-the-less) feels ok with the notion that they can not only exclude others but also call that non discriminatory? When specifically if the heterosexuals decided to hold a party only for those who have sex with the opposite sex, that the minority would not be "up in arms" about the disparity in this. Pansexual (open to anyone regardless of gender, orientation or play style) parties are meant for all. How can one group be so damning and put so many people in a box surrounding identity and sexuality as to exclude them based on how they present themselves or how they label themselves? We need to find ways to foster inclusion for all. Yet if the queer community wants to segregate themselves from everyone else and declare themselves so radically different that they require playing and socializing away from all who are different, how can this be achieved?
How can this group of queers, cross pollinate to gain understanding, new friends, allies and support if they don't get their kink on with the rest of us? The queers are saying that they don't want to be watched or judged by anyone who does not share their label whilst playing. For the most part, the majority are not judging ... I've been watching them for years. In fact, I see more judgment on play styles and identity from the queers to everyone else. There seems to be this notion that queers perceive themselves as so radically different that they must be given their own space. Each grouping of people is unique and truly faces its own challenges. And for as long as we continue to find reason to not see our similarities as sexual outlaws, we will forever face judgment from both the outside vanilla world and from our fellow kinksters. We should be working towards a common goal of acceptance, tolerance and respect. As it stands right now, all I am witnessing is a lot of slurs, some bashing, untruths, fear and negative outlooks. Not very promising at all.
Why can't the queers party and socialize with everyone else? Why is it ok for the queers to act bigoted towards anyone not the same as them and not be called on it by others? Because they are the minority, they get a "get out of jail card" for their behaviors, however misinformed. Not.
Further what gets my goat, (no I don't own a goat) is that it is most often than not this very group of people that wants their own events, that also expresses their inability to pay for it. Like really, who pray tell is going to foot the bill? Are people really so clueless as to what it costs financially to host a party, let alone to lease a space where such things could take place? To pay for all the items necessary to have a party run safely, well equipped, with heat, lights, drinks, food, equipment, music .... the list goes on and on. Groups that are successful from my standpoint are ones where they stand on their own two feet. They do not demand that others around them do things to keep there ideas afloat, they don't whine about something not existing, they set about creating it. Then someone comes along and offers the physical space for this group of people to create a group and its moaned aloud, that it has to be basically free or low, very low cost. And that even if the event were created, then likely it would not even be enjoyed because of to many unknown dynamics. Talk about being pissy. Wanting something, whining aloud about it, yet doing nothing to support its emergence even when given the space and encouragement to do so. This is so contrary to being proactive that it is simply baffling. It feels selfish, and at it's very heart, also discriminatory. What do you think?
And my reply follows, please keep in mind this is my personal opinion, you dont have to agree with it, but if you expect me to respect YOUR opinion do likewise for mine. Thanks! Hi Jennifer, So, queer seperatists are giving you isues? Personally I cant say I'm suprised you'd be faced with a small group that asks for so much for so little. Those people you mention in your post fall under what I call "militant gays" (just my personal opinion). More of my expereince with these kind of people has been via online chat rooms, and mostly with lesbians. The feeling I got from many of them was that these are people that spent so much time closeted about thier sexuality that they cant deal with the idea of anyone but firmly gay people being around them, or people that came out and were so intensely berated/abused for thier sexuality that they likewise cannot function in the presence of people that aren't as gay as they are. Thier personal history has made them inflexible and oft times bitter about thier sexuality, as such they can only find comfort with people who are like them. Of course this isn't always the case, but it seems to be a pretty common theme. Now I'm not saying that people finding like minded people to group with is a bad thing, but when they are as inflexible and demanding as the group you are faced with, it's definately not good. Of course bigotry in any form is a bad thing, yet it seems that the minorities in any segment of a population, sexual or racial, have become more and more outspoken and with the advent of liberal laws and policies, has fostered a sense that if a minority group cries loud enough, or threatens to sue, they will get what they want regardless of the lack of senisbility or bigotry they display. Again, not always a bad thing, but when that group is being self centered and short sighted,... People that dont see them selves as bigots are always the worst. I dealt with a few people like this in my time in the military. People that used thier race as a point of contention with everyone around them that was not the same as them. The fact that nobody cared and treated them as an equal was besides the point it seemed. One young man, I swear,... This person was one of the most racist persons I have ever met, but he failed to think so because he was a minority, he (allegedly) had a hard life because of it, and he felt entitled to his personal rage towards people in the majority. His seperatism and blatant racist behavior was unaparent to him because his personal perception didn't allow for it. I also worked with a man that is the biggest homophobe I've ever met. Good man at heart, but his views on sexuality were so deeply held that he failed to see that his attitudes were extremely discriminatory. Many gay people feel that same rage, that same sense of entitlement, and honestly I doubt you'll ever find a way to make them happy even if you provied what they are asking and made it free. Someone will find a reason to bitch. These are also the type of people that have given the term "gay rights" a bad name. From a business standpoint, attempting to cater to a minority that doesn't present enough of a showing to be profitable or even capable of breaking even is not worth the effort. It's nice to try and keep everyone happy and present a sex positive atmosphere for everyone of any sex, race, & sexual preference to come and enjoy, but the reality is there is a vast amount of people that will never be comfortable enough to be happy, wether they are the militant gay minority, or, on the far end of the spectrum, uptight close minded heterosexuals. Bottom line, I'd tell them it's not happening, and wash my hands of it. What you do, you do well, and people really enjoy it. Your recent sucess and expanding noteriety are evidence of that. However, it's not for everyone, it's not even for a lot of people. But the numerous folks that can appreciate what you and Libido Lounge offer, those are the people in your target audience and the people that need your attention. The small amount of people that are determined to be unhappy, well,...
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Meet & Greets, the further adventures
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Posted:Jun 27, 2010 5:47 am
Last Updated:Sep 12, 2010 9:56 am
15110 Views
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I've saidf it many a time, meets aren't hard to do, they're just a matter of persistence and the willingness to try, and yes, even fail. We've been doing this for over 5 years now, with only a short break while we were in CA. In that time we've only had one night that nobody showed (of course someone came out right after we bailed, fook'n Murphy!), so we can safely call our little meet a success. I do have to mention the failure and summary cancellation of the Oak Harbor meet, but it was not for a lack of trying. both on our part and that of those good folks that came out, & mostly from off island. If more locals had grown a pair, maybe we'd still have it. But that is neither here nor there, or even the real topic here. So what IS the topic you ask? Well, it's a simple matter of burnout. Yup, I'm burned the fuck out. Working a job I loathe, not having the time to do many of the things we like to do, never seeing any of our freinds, and then we spend that one Saturday I have off hosting the dinner meet. I'm not bagging on the people that come out, or even those people that dont (those that moan about wanting a meet & then never come out, they can go hug a nut), it's just the sum of all this is starting to drag on me. I want to DO something, for the first time in many years I feel like we're in a rut and I despise ruts. There have been several times I've thought of delaying the meet a month or three so we can go do something else, maybe head to one of the Southern meets or New Horizons again, maybe a trip or go camping, something new for a change. I think this is a point where the shit job comes back into play as it pays shit as well, so doing those things would cost us too much. We need to get out more and do more, but the reality is the one time we get to see people and meet new people is at the dinner meet. It's kind of a catch 22. Anyway, we've already set the date and posted for July, so we are comitted there. The logical question from there would be will there be an August meet? Probably, odds are highly in favor.
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If ya cant take the heat,...
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Posted:May 2, 2010 11:29 pm
Last Updated:May 22, 2010 6:22 pm
11452 Views
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We moderate a group, and recently we had one member couple that had come up complaining after just over six weeks on the board (mistake #1), that there were too few people in the area (we live in a small military town on a fucking island, hellooooo) and most of the ones that were are "older" (mistake #2). I might add that they are both in thier early 30's. Anyway, now it appears they have deleted the complaint post and have apparently deleted thier profile as well.
Now before I go on a rant, here is what I replied to them: "Actually you're in the perfect age group for the people on the rock. However this place suffers from terminal smalltownitis. Add on many are military and dont want to risk anything getting back to thier coworkers (maybe bad, maybe nuetral, my commands knew for the last 9 years I was in w. no effect), so many folks around here tend to keep thier activities veeewy vewy quiet. WHY people so paranoid would be on an internet adult site as loosely accessible as this? Who knows! Younger folks tend to use the clubs and the direct contact they provide, then it kind of shifts gradualy to more online connections as you get "older", have less time for going out (, work, etc.), and realize the people around you realy dont care who you play with. As such many of the more approachable & active members on here are "older". Something I have found is if you dont look at how many miles are on the person, but how well they carry them, age is just a number. I admit it, we've all seen some people that look fook'n amazing for thier age. On the flip side we've seen some younger people,... Still, in the lifestyle it never hurts to know people, of all ages, some of us know lots of other people and invariably may know someone that is closer to what you're looking for. With this website, networking is THE way to make it work for you. Regardless, if you dont try, you'll never suceed, simple as that."
OK, game on. I know I'm not gonna win many freinds among folks that dont already know us with the following statement, and quite simply, I dont fook'n care! One of my most favoritest FriendFinder-x pet peeves is internet whiners. People that expect miracle results and loads of freaky circus sex just because they joined this idiotic site, people that pay for it are the worst, and then have the gall to bitch because they expended minimal effort for minimal amount of time just to get shit results. Well golly, ya think? Those people quite simply annoy the shit out of me, but I was still nice.
The good news is we still meet more interesting and genuinely good people from all over the area, and even up in BC, irregardless of those numerous,... people that refuse to own up to the fact that life and many of the things in it are what you make it. Garbage in, garbage out.
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Ever find those random socks, and wonder where they came from?
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Posted:Mar 12, 2010 6:05 pm
Last Updated:Dec 18, 2013 7:35 am
6727 Views
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I have a theory, just something that occured to me really. The potential source of all those random socks that seem to have no partner in your sock drawer: Sock babies.
Yes, I said sock babies. Think about it, we all joke about makin sock babies, but in reality they exist and explain how we can have a drawer full of paired socks, yet still accumilate a pile of mis-matched socks.
Those extra socks are really your illegitemate sock !!!
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Dont Ask Dont Tell?
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Posted:Feb 7, 2010 6:01 am
Last Updated:Dec 26, 2017 12:47 am
7582 Views
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With the recent news bites about the possible repeal of the DADT policy the military has on homosexual men and women in the military, there has been a LOT of online commentary. I have read several of them, commented on one or two, this is my refined statement I have on the subject. Please keep in mind this is MY opinion. If you feel the need to reply to my post and wish me to respct YOURS, please reply in a respectful and educated manner.
I'm a retired member of the armed forces. In the 20 years I was defending the rights of all Amercans to be self centered and narrow minded members of the ME ME ME generation, I met MANY gay men and women in the service. And they were in ALL of the 5 branches (FYI: that includes the Marines and Army). They have ALWAYS been there, they will ALWAYS be there, & the harsh reality is those folks that dont like the idea need to shut the fuck up and get over it.
Still, ya gotta love these people that spout BS about how it will be SOOOOO detrimental to the service, and it's wrong, immoral, just a bunch of fags looking for "special rights",... It's almost comical really. Sad, but still a form of hillarity. Whats most comical is that, in reading in several military community message boards, I find that the majority of the people that say it's wrong and it will hurt the services are NOT in the service and NEVER have been. WTF??? I also find that many people in the service, at all levels, are for the repeal of DADT and forsee no adverse effects on thier fellow servicemembers because essentialy there's not going to be any change IN the service. And these huge changes, the "special priveleges" that the gay men and women in the service now and those that desire to serve are asking for are not special at all. "Gay rights" is a over used and incorrectly interpreted phrase. This is not a matter of men being able to wear womens uniforms & makeup or some other crap, there's NO special priveledges involved in this controversy. These men and women simply desire true equality in the service of thier country. The ability to do the job, to stand the line, and indeed, to die in the line of fire without consideration or threat because of what sex the person they come home to is.
And just to clarify, I'm not gay (my boyfreind is! *joking!*). I am an expereinced swinger surrently practicing poly-fidelity with my wife and our 3rd. I'm open minded enough to be accepting of peoples personal choices in a professional setting so long as they are capable of doing the job they are assigned. I'm MUCH more concerened with a persons ability to perform thier duties correctly and efficiently, in a professional manner, and according to the rules and regulation set forth in the UCMJ than I am in who they're tripping up in thier off time. I dont want them in my business with my lifestyle, I sure as fuck do NOT care about thiers.
Anyway, interestingly enough, every single one of the gay men and women I have known in the service was a go-getter, & typicaly more dependable than many of thier straight counterparts. Many of the people I have seen posting in these other message boards know of gays in thier units that serve with pride and distinction, & many leaders could give a rip so long as they do thier job and do it right. And folks, I'm talking about dirt eating lead slinging grunts in the battle fields of Afghanistan and Iraq. People that the nay sayers claim will NEVER accept homosexuals already DO. Sure, there's some of the typical ribbing, they mess with the gay guys as much as the jewish, black, hispanic, females, etc. Anyone that has been, and is in the service now knows nobody is exempt from some form of ass-hattery. The ability to accept people based on thier merits and not on ther sex/race/preference is about professionalism and pride, & the fact remains there are plenty of gays serving in the military today tht are known for what they are, and nobody cares. Also, in this time when they need more people to do the job, many of the higher commanders are looking the other way so long as they fufil thier duties and keep it in check. Like anyone, step on your dick and you are toast.
Now, bring in the fact that our current generation of recruits are much more sexualy liberated and accepting of others personal choices. The issue, as it ever has been with change, is more with the old war horses that dont know how to change or are afraid to. There's also your backwoods redneck f-tards that claim they'll happily beat a gay to death before they share a foxhole with one. Those that are in will be dealt with or will deal with it, those that have yet to join either wont, or will learn to deal. My opinion is I dont want these kinds of shit bird sub humans to represent me or my country, nevermind suck up my tax dollars, but someone has to catch the bullets. Harsh, yes, but my opinion.
Anyway, the real point of repealing DADT is NOT allowing gay men to wear womens uniforms, prance about in half shirts and booty shorts, or for either sex to openly ogle others in the showers. It IS to allow these people, who have always seperated thier personal and professional lives, and served with honor and distinction, to live in the manner they choose without the constant threat of beng called out, booted from the military, & essentialy destroying thier lives. Nevermind weakening our forces by removing what is essentialy a highly trained and useful asset when we cant afford to lose anyone. It's about the ability for our fellow Americans, that are willing to fight and die to protect all of us, even the narrow minded homophobes, to live thier private life in the manner they so choose, under the primary belief that we as Americans hold dear: "With Liberty and Justice for ALL". ____________________________________________________
Of course, while on this topic, there are a couple repetative points the opposition always brings up without fail. To get a jump on those those I'll adress the big two here:
One of the excuses the phobics parade around is about the risk of AIDS on the battlefield, & how the people at the highest risk for HIV are fags and having them wounded on the battle field will cause issues in a unit. Taking aside the fact this is already being dealt with anyway, these folks need to pull thier heads out, seriously. You run a much higher risk of dying from intense lead poisoning (being shot) than from exposure to HIV from a wounded gay soldier. I have met so many scumbag straight men in the military that had loads of questionable sexual contacts, wether it be with prostitutes or others of questionable intent, it's idiotic. I've seen people do some DUMB shit just to get thier dick wet, some nasty, nasty shit. These douchewaffles use no protection, no thought, no brain engaged. But hey, thats normal "manly behavior" and totaly acceptable, right?... Everyone in the military gets tested anually for HIV (some of us more often), but how many get tested for hepatitis, syphalis, ghonorrea, herpes, etc. unless there's some sign of an issue? NONE! And these asshats are convinced the gay community is the threat on the battlefield??? Reality check: Last time I read about it, according to the CDC, the fastest growing number of HIV cases is not in the gay community (where they are more concious of the threat and more willing to talk about protection, a lot like the poly community it seems), it's in the heterosexual community. Seriously, I think I'd rather take my risks treating a wounded gay man or woman than a majority of these he-man macho types that live by the "this is my rfle, this is my gun" mantra. And a blood transfusion? Oh hell no!
Another popular argument by the phobes is the living/bathing arrangements. They want to be able to live and bathe with women if gays are going to be able to live and bathe with them (I say that from the male standpoint as the more typical female really has no isses with lesbains so long as they aren't bugging them). Now the 3 of us, as expereinced poly-lifestylers, we've been in places like that and I'm all for it when everyone can behave as rational adults and not a bunch of leg humping puppies. But take that scenario, add it to barely post-pubescent males that have come out of boot camp and training and being told they are invincible killing machines, and throwing them in a barraks with females and expecting everything to be hunky-dory? Are you fucking serious?... Lets face it, sexual segregation of quarters and bathing facilities in this country? Keep dreaming, not happeneing. The US is still WAY too sexually repressed to be ready for that, the pissing contests DADT has stirred up is in itself evidence of that. Potentially in a couple more decades, till then folks'll just have to deal with the meat gazers.
Again, this is MY oppinion, if you wish me to respct YOURS, please reply in a respectful and educated manner. If you're one of the aforementioned flaming biggots and cant manage that, just kindly shut the fuck up.
Thanks, and have a great day!
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Variations on a Swinging article comment
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Posted:Jan 29, 2010 6:31 am
Last Updated:Dec 26, 2017 12:51 am
7026 Views
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The article in question would be from this websites member articles. It has to do with something I have been tossing around for some time now. It has to do with how to explain the dynamics of open relationships and dealing with other people, the connections between those people, and how it affects the overall expereince.
I simplified what I was speakin on as it was a comment and not an actual article. I may post my own article later on, building on this blog, hopefully with some thought provoking comments from my dear readers.
OK, so here's what I have!
Now take away the variations of swingers, from the people looking for real connection to the folks that are there for the free for all. Lets look at basic relational dynamics.
In a couple, you have one connection between the two people. Now in our relationship with Jamie, many folks just assume that adding another woman just doubles the potential issues, and here's where my thought process started. The reality is it's almost an exponential figure as it adds twice the issues on top of the existing ones in a triad. Even more when you add a fourth person.
Lets simplify it with some visual aids! Get some paper and writing instrument (homework! Woot!).
Write a 1 and a 2 with a short line between them, the line being the personal connection. Now, write a 3 below the 1 and make a line from it to the 1, and another to the 3. We now have 3 lines of connection, hence not twice the potential issues, but 3 times as many. Now, lets have some real fun. Write a 4 under the 2. Draw lines from it to the 1, to the 2, and to the 3. If you count them all you'll have a grand total of SIX lines of connection. How's that for a mind fuck? Wanna have some real fun, take our situation as a triad, and try adding a couple to that,... Take your previous four numbers, write a 5 next to them and draw an additional four lines to each of the other numbers. Thats TEN connections that have to work for five people that require more than passing attraction in common to get naked.
Anyway, back to the typical scneario of two couples! Taking our visual aid in mind, think of four people, or two couples, each single one of those connections has the potential to affect every one of the others in varying degrees. And people ask why it's so hard to meet a "real couple". Hah! As if it were just a single connection between two pairs!
OK, if you're at that point in your lives as a swingers that you can attend a party/orgy, and just go at whomever is willing, and then go home w/o a thought, this doesn't really apply to you. At least not till someone else catches more than pasing frictional attention of you or your mate. THEN it gets interesting again! But lets hope not, not trying to jinx anyone here, just thinking out loud(ish).
OK then!!! Thats what happens when my meds wear off. I'd be happy to hear from anyone with CONSTRUCTIVE, well articulated inputs. Anything else will just be deleted, so dont bother. It's my blog, deal w. it.
Thanks!
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Chat-tards, gotta love 'em tha pricks!
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Posted:Jan 28, 2010 4:29 am
Last Updated:Jan 28, 2010 4:30 am
5963 Views
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Not mentioning anyone in particular really. Just been going through our "iggy box" and clearing it out. Figgure I dont spend that much time in the chat room these days, not to mention it's DEAD, so may as well start fresh.
However,...
I have the chat options window open on the side and am clicking the remove button over & over as I watch videos, listen to music on MySapce (She Wants Revenge currently, great band), or watch TV. This is day two and I am,... *looks at list* ALMOST done with the D's. Got through the numbers and _ names, & almost through the B's last night.
This has brought me to the realization that either I spent WAY too much time on the chats over the last couple years since FriendFinder-x last dumped out my box for me, OR, there are a whole lot of fook'n chat-tards,... Granted, anyone that pops in with a name that has anything to do with thier dick or what they do with it goes in automaticly, along with anyone who has a pic of thier crank set as thier main photo. But still, TWO days, two days and I'm still not even to the E's,...
Fook'n chat-tards,...
Ah well, still, as much as I find those folks with dick names and pics of 'lil willy unimaginative, I know some of them are ok folks, and as a host of the only local dinner meet, I should probably be able to see those folks when they try to talk to us so I dont come off as a total prick. I'm not saying I'm NOT a prick, just not a TOTAL prick.
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Fortue cookies
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Posted:Jan 14, 2010 1:59 am
Last Updated:Jul 3, 2010 5:56 am
6356 Views
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Keep you plans secret, in bed. Advice for those planning "whoops" butt sex.
You will take a chance in something in the near future, in bed. "hey honey, I was watching this S&M video,..."
You have a strong awareness of self; others take notice of this, in bed. Translation: You get caught makin sock babies, a lot.
Get your mind set... confidence will lead you on, in bed. Well no shit, nobody likes timid lay!
Not having a goal is more to be feared than not reaching one, in bed. Getting laid is not a goal, getting laid WELL on the other hand,...
Don't get so caught up in the daily grind that you never find any time to enjoy yourself, in bed. If you work so much you're too tired for sex, get another fucking job!
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The Oak Harbor meet is dead, long live the Mt.Vernon meet!
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Posted:Nov 6, 2009 3:40 am
Last Updated:Jan 5, 2010 10:54 am
6771 Views
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Yup, tis done deal. We're tanking the OH dinner meet in favor of greener pastures. We'll be doin our monthly gathering in Mt. Vernon, starting this month at Max Dales. It will still be the 2nd Saturday of the month, but we'll get there around 8pm instead of 7. Otherwise, same routine, come on out to see old freinds & meet new people over dinner and a drink or two.
Just hope the menu is still the same, I miss some of that food, it was GOOD!
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The death of the Oak Harbor meet is nigh
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Posted:Oct 16, 2009 5:15 am
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2024 1:41 am
5920 Views
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So, due to the near total lack of participation by the people on the island it's looking like we'll be moving the primary meet back to Mount Vernon starting with the November 14th M&G.
Just not enough support from the islanders, and while we continue to have a good showing of folks from off island and know there are people that like having it here, it's in decline because nobody local is coming out. So, maybe we can get some of y'all off the rock since we wont be at ground zero where folks are afraid of being seen with a bunch of pervs.
Anyway, we need to get over there and look at a couple of our old locations to see how they look now, then we'll post the date/time/location in our groups. Barring another location coming up it's either Max Dales or the bowling alley. I realize the bowling alley offers more things to do with the pool tables, darts, and of course, bowling, but I always liked the atmosphere at Max Dales. That and the food is good (beats the slop they call food at the bowling alley all to hell!).
We'll post info when a descision has been made.
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To link to this blog (3FreqsOnnaLeash) use [blog 3FreqsOnnaLeash] in your messages.
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