Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > ThomBombadil > Vs. The World. |
Last Post Kills Audience.
|
Last Post Kills Audience. Where in the hell has Thom Bombadil disappeared to? Not that anyone has asked. As these things often go, I've been pushed to the back burner for most. Though, did I ever reach the front? Does any of this matter? Throughout the childish bickering and backstabbing that has engulfed the entirety of the blog world (I like to call it “The Great Blog War”, at least until another one occurs, at which point I'll change the names to WBW I and WBW II respectively), not one person ever asked my opinion or asked me to choose a side. Which I greatly appreciate. This is one time where being forgotten had its perks. But in being forgotten, anyone who has not taken to getting to know Thom beyond this blog has missed out on some of the most fantastic stuff that has ever happened to a man who goes by the pseudonym Thom Bombadil. Here's a short list: I inherited about a month's worth of income from my great grandmother (who died peacefully last month, only 2 weeks before her 100th birthday), allowing me to buy the laptop I'm currently writing this on. I was offered a scholarship based on a 4 page essay that I had written sometime last year. It will cover about half my tuition expenses for next semester. I, on a whim, auditioned for a play at school. I was called back to audition again, and then was called back once more to be offered a role. It's not a big part, but it is a huge deal, since this is one of those times I simply put myself on the line and was rewarded for it. I was approached by the chemistry department, who requested to publish my paper on the history of atomic theory (which was posted here some time ago). I am now a published writer, a fact that will most certainly be noted on every application I ever fill out from here to eternity. Am I missing anything? I feel like I'm missing something. Anyway, the point has been made that I'm having the time of my life right now, which is fantastic (though I can't help but get this paranoid feeling, like maybe I'm going to get hit by a bus tomorrow). Very exciting stuff. Things haven't been all pleasantries, though. I've been struggling with intimacy problems as of late. You see, there are a couple fantastic people who recognise that I am also a fantastic person. But, not only do they recognise my wonderfulness, they also realise that maybe I'm not one they should let get away so easily. This is a good thing, especially when it comes to one girl in particular. The bad thing is, I'm so tied up and confused about the person I really want to be with, and trying to figure out what she really wants and whether or not that will ever include me in a way that I'm currently wanting it to include me that I don't really have any feelings for New Girl beyond casual playtime. I shouldn't break her heart, and if things were different (id est, if I were sure of my place in Special Girl's future) I certainly wouldn't break her heart. Will NG ever mean to me what SG means to me? No idea. From my experiences, I doubt it. Multiple girls have meant worlds to me, but in very different ways. SG will always be special. But NG will at least be able to see me as worth holding onto. I don't have any way of knowing if SG really has any feelings for me beyond “Let's be best friends forever!” Hell, I've been asking for a clear answer for months, and have gotten nowhere. If you haven't figured it out from my writings thus far, SG likes to be vague. Mind numbingly vague. Frustratingly vague. Yank-my-hair-out-and-donate-it-to-a-cancer-patient vague. I'm willing to be patient for people who can at least tell me that I'm worth waiting for. She likes to tell me that I'm definitely worth everyone else waiting for. Maybe I should take that as a sign. Maybe she's been telling me all along that I'm worth it for everyone else to wait for, but not for her. You know, I've been avoiding talking about things like this here because I don't believe anyone cares. Hell, I get sick of all my whining and drama about why I continue to have a bleak future of bachelorhood. But, I pegged you with a bunch of wonderfulness earlier in the scene, so I don't give a care at the moment if no one else wants to hear me vent. I feel like I never have anything good to say anymore when I come here. This has just become a place to vent. And in venting, I bring myself and everyone around me down. This place used to be fun. And my life isn't all misery and horror stories. I've generally been quite satisfied as of late. I feel like I'm doing something fulfilling with my life, and I'm having a good time doing it. This blog should be a reflection of that. Instead, I come here bearing negativity. What am I expecting to find? Reassurance? Validation? Pity? I don't need that from anyone here. I know that. So why do I continue writing? Ok, now I'm just blabbing out all the questions that are going through my head. Lets get one last thing out. I've told you all before that I'm horrible about keeping up with everyone else. I wrote a blog about it. It doesn't mean I don't care, it doesn't mean I don't like any of you, it just means that I'm awful about going “Hey, I haven't talked to or seen this person in forever. Let's give them a call.” Sometimes I think that the fact that you haven't said anything to me means that you're not interested. Of course, this is a two way street, and I'm sure some of you feel the same way about me. I am interested. I'm just horrible about acting on that. Call it an insecurity. But if you ever think of me, feel free to say hi. I'll be happy knowing that I'm not forgotten after all. See ya guys. ~Thom 4fwin, I owe you cookies. Or another prize of your choosing. Let me know what you'd like. "Everything in moderation, including moderation" - Oscar Wilde |
|||
|
Yeah I knew almost all of this as well. No I'm not your stalker either. Could it be that one chick from that place one time? Lol. I'm happy for your successes. Keep it up. This could be a great year for you.  "For a woman there is nothing more erotic than being understood." ~ Molly Haskell Read about Me Being Naughty o-o
| ||
|
I know! I'm excited that so many people want to come! I'll fill up half the theater with people coming to see the guy with a whole 10 lines! Bwahahaha Oh, and I remembered what I forgot: I did my own taxes for the first time, and was able to apply so many deductions that I got the biggest tax return I've ever gotten on the lowest amount of money I've ever made since I got out of high school. "Everything in moderation, including moderation" - Oscar Wilde
| ||
|
Young Benadar, Never forgotten. Your a good man. I am happy for your successes and for your growth -- even though at time learning experiences are painful. Keep in touch.     
| ||
|
Yes! Yes! YES!!!  "For a woman there is nothing more erotic than being understood." ~ Molly Haskell Read about Me Being Naughty o-o
| ||
|
*sigh* You too, huh? I think I may be done here as well. I spent the last two weeks offline, wishing like crazy I could get back on - and as soon as I finally did, tonight, I realised...I just don't really care anymore. I'm glad about your successes. And I'll miss reading your blog. Same goes for Bubbles and Smarty. But hey, gotta do what's right for you, ja? Well, perhaps our paths will cross again in the future. Till then, good luck with the play and the writing, and I'll keep my fingers crossed that life keeps getting better. Do not seek an external refuge, but be a light unto yourself. "Be the change you want to see." HalfNekkid Wednesday Peekaboo
|
Become a member to create a blog
