Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > aascrompn > The Shit I Say |
400th Post... Yay for me! Sigh...
|
400th Post... Yay for me! Sigh... Where to begin, ya know? I think that  In the beginning, of my existence on FriendFinder-x, I started off doing what every single male here does. I ran searches, sent emails to bots, stared at all the hot women that really don’t exist as being ‘available’, etc. After about two months of striking not one conversation, I was pretty much done with the site. I racked it up as another site of which I will be unlucky. But, I digress… I’ve been online dating for coming up on three years. I started off, of course, on traditional ‒ vanilla ‒ dating sites, stemming from a breakup with my former fiancé. I saw a ton of cute women online. I realized ‒ after my mother begging me ‒ that online dating was not as geeky as I thought it was. I realized that although the idea is still somewhat newer, it’s really got potential. I also realized that the ratio of guys to hot women, however, was so very not in my favor, due to a number of reasons (I’m only 5’7”, I’m not ripped, I’m not a lawyer, I don’t drive a BMW, etc). After about a year of the vanilla sites, I guess I had accumulated numerous dates, but I was not fulfilled. I had sex with maybe (if I can remember back) about three girls from those sites. Sex was not my goal; however, I realized that my heart still was not done bleeding from my breakup with my dating antichrist. I didn’t find it right to act like I was courting these women, when, as it ended up, I just was in the mood to have some fun. Some of these sites really push the whole serious relationship idea, and you’d be amazed at how many women really wanted to settle down, and in a hurry! Where could I go to just find what I needed? Can I not just have some fun and look for some action? Sure I can! I’ll go to FriendFinder-x!! So, after I came here and got nowhere with the searches, I’d already sank the money into the site, I started looking around. I was bored with looking at the naked women who would never talk to me and somehow, I came across Blogville. I didn’t like most of what I saw at first, as what I later recognized, was that of new bloggers. I saw many, many advertisements of the individuals and what they were looking for being used in a blog, just as they were already stating in their profiles. However, on another drunken night, sometime in November of ’05, I came across a local blogger. His writing was unlike any I’ve ever read before ‒ rather than popular authors. His writing flowed. I used a dictionary too many times when I first started reading him. He blogged about his journey of a relationship, outside of his marriage, and all the excitement and pitfalls associated with such a venture. Seriously Real changed it all for me. What he didn’t know ‒ and is finding out now ‒ is that I secretly despised him. I hated him for going behind his wife’s back. I hated him for sacrificing his family, which consisted of two beautiful (and they are beautiful, as I’ve seen pics of them). I despised what he was doing, but, I couldn’t stop reading! His words were melodic, and his life was a real-time unfolding of an episode, or five, of Day’s of Our Lives. I found myself starting to take his side of the situation! I found myself rooting for the underdog. WTF? How have all of my morals changed to the point of actually wanting him to succeed? I’ll tell you how; I could feel what he was feeling. I could feel the highs, lows, orgasms, blood-enriched tears that he would eventually cry. I could feel it. That’s when I knew that here was where I needed to be. I wanted to write like that! I wanted to start my own journey on the quest, not for the Holy Grail, but something much richer ‒ love. He got me thinking about love again. He changed my perspective on why people do what they do, and I’ve learned quite a bit. I will address this later on, as I will be answering another commenter’s question about how I have changed during this year that I’ve been here. So, a little lost and a lot scared about opening myself up for all to read, I started my own blog. I ran across a lot of local bloggers that were really very popular, and more supportive than I’ll ever deserve. There are way too many to list here, however, caressmewell was a HUGE supporter. She had the great idea of starting a group in the local area, consisting of just Atlanta bloggers, to meet maybe once a month. Let me introduce to you, the original infantry of what has become to be known as the Atlanta Blogger Army. caressmewell, serisously_real, sexydisaster30, elbman, freshmoe, and I, the ROTC cadet that sucked major ass to join the actually Army. Now that I have completely gone around my elbow to get to my asshole, let me answer how I’ve been able to come up with 400 things to write about. Through these people listed above, I ventured out of their blogs to others’. I found some very funny people (bardicman and travilingintexas) found some very deep-thinking people, and last, but not least, found some very well written women, of which had me in complete awe. Not only were they beautiful, they could write poetry (of which I don’t even like) that enthralled me. From there, and because a now had friends and was feeling rather, um, supported, I decided I would take on a new mission. I decided to go after one of five girls that I liked a lot and post my outcomes. It all started with a girl that is no longer here, Sister_Act. Anybody that has followed my blog for a while knows that I’m naturally drawn to blonde hair, blue-eyed women that have great figures! This girl was exactly that, however, her erotic poetry was amazing. She wrote about BDSM stuff (which I don’t even like) that got me hard! She was that good. I must’ve toyed with her for a couple of weeks on her blog and left ‘clues’ for her. In the end, I crashed and burned hard! I should’ve just written her an email, but I thought that she would pick up on my obvious ‘clues’. Nope! It then went from there to another girl, still here on the blogs, of which I fucked up tremendously and told her how much I was into her, except, however, I came across looking ‘overly obsessive’. I went from her to who I now refer to as my Little Mother Teresa, but she had just come out of a messed up situation herself, and was in no way shape or form ready to start anything new. I decided to end my mission. I had weeks worth of utter heart bleeding on my blog and I was coming across as an idiot! It hurt like hell, but I was still gathering an audience. I almost gave up. I was tired of looking so damn pathetic, but that’s how I felt! It was at this time that I ran across another female blogger, stemming from Sister_Act’s blog. She is now known as my Boomerang Bitch. My Boomerang Bitch and I started emailing and IM’ing in roughly the end of February to the beginning of April. Things started off very sarcastic and very flirtatious. It didn’t take long, but feelings started to grow. It doesn’t take long online for this to happen, but things got incredibly deep and very, very romantic. As a matter of fact, the majority of my blog is indirectly, and directly, written to her. I have most of my blog hidden at this point, but that’s mostly to protect her identity, as she has a partner that she is involved with. I wrote 2nd grade poems, fantasies, and any heart-felt emotion about her that hit my mind. If I awoke to a beautiful sunrise, I thought of her. If I saw a shooting star, I thought of her. When going to sleep, and pulling my pillow tight, I thought of her… Not only did I think of her, I wrote all of this. Things continued this way from April to that of the beginning of August. In August, sexydisaster30 planned a blogger meet. People from all over the world joined us to get to know each other. Literally two days after the meet, she told me that she was done. She felt as if she needed to work things out in her current relationship. I was devastated. I didn’t know what to do. I knew that could be the outcome, as she was back and forth for a couple of weeks, but the finality of it actually surprised me in that I felt I would be the chosen one. Alas, I was not! I bled all over my blog. My local friends came to save me from, well, myself. SexyD and Freshmoe came and made sure my drinking didn’t get out of hand and that I wasn’t going to do anything stupid. However, much to my delight and surprise, Little Mother Teresa was there for me. We met at the meet and she was on IM, and the phone, right when all of this happened. It started off as friendship, but literally about a week to a week and a half later, I knew I fell for her. It wasn’t hard. This girl’s compassion is like none that I felt before! She was physically sick on my behalf because she knew that I was reeling from the pain of my loss. Things blossomed from there until it ended in the beginning half of September. This, I did not see coming at all, and you talk about hurt! I lie… actually, there had been a warning about a week before it did all end, but it was still a complete and utter blow to my system. My drinking got WELL out of hand. I blogged about everything. I said some very, very evil things. I lashed out at not only her, but myself. I was really very unstable. I felt a love for her and knew that it was no longer reciprocated. I became very vindictive (a trait I’ve always harbored, but one I don’t like) and I completely got carried away. I could go back and count, but half of the posts that I wrote were in an intoxicated state. I ripped some down. I NEVER do that! I had to, however, because they were not about how I felt, but they were out of sheer hate! This draws us to present times. Now, I am over Little Mother Teresa. I have moved on (which I will expound on near the end of this). But, to answer a very short question, long windedly, as long as I have an interest (woman) to write about, or in my sights, I’ll take the shot and write about them. So [phot keithcancook], there ya have it! That’s how I’ve come up with 400 posts. It’s all revolved around my love life (or lack thereof).  TheDude, dasher121 wants to know some silly facts… Hmm… where do I start. 1. I once tried to do a naked dance while coming out of the shower (you’re all aware of the one) and it didn’t work, because I only have a two inch penis. The only thing that successfully flopped around for me was what travelingintexas refers to as my McMan boobs (McDonald’s made man boobs). 2. I had a girlfriend when I was just four years old. I’m not kidding. I grabbed her ass, on stage, when we were, get this, tap dancing. Her mother (my mother’s best friend) made her dump me. 3. I was a band fag. I played all throughout high school. I joined the wrestling team to counter the fact that I was a band fag. I really sucked at wrestling. 4. I was in an all boy’s choir (The Atlanta Boy Choir) from when I was 5 till that of 14. I guess that’s not too bad, as I traveled the world with them and actually sat in Sofia Loren’s lap when singing for her. 5. I had a<b> wet dream </font></b>half way through boot camp. 6. I had to wash all the vehicle windows of our flight, in the rain, for kicking my sergeant’s ass in the Air Force. 7. I received 16 stitches around my mouth for falling into a pull-out couch, while on a get laid mission, on spring break ’07. She (the girl I just met) took me to the ER. 8. I chased a dude 6’3” around the room w/ my pool cue, as he kept talking shit over the table. I take pool too seriously. 9. I, intoxicated one night, attempted to dive off the bar onto a dude for running his mouth at me. 10. I passed out on the lawn of said bar for 3 hours and was found by the bartender (my best friend) behind a retaining wall, after she searched for over an hour. That’s about all that I have right now… I am just brain dead after this long post. mineiswetter wants me to allow questions… So, I guess I’ll open the floor up for any odd questions you may have… Lastly, I have a new one… She is currently known as my Sweetie Cakes (she won’t let me call her my Big Booty Barbie yet). She is definitely career-driven and has one hell of an amazing ass. It doesn’t hurt that she has blonde hair and blue eyes. It also doesn’t hurt that she loves sex as much as I… With that being said, I still have a focus. She is it. I still have a muse to write about. So, I guess my blog and my journey will continue. I guess all is good, thus far, in my dark little world… I guess, there will be a 401st post coming tomorrow, for what else is there to do when you have no life?? ~ AAS (Continuing the quest… for love)  |
||||
10/17/2006 8:10 am |
Wow. Sounds like a roller coaster ride indeed. I am glad i met you. You are a great guy with a HUGE heart. Good luck with all you do! Much love..{=} To know me is to love me.. 
| |||
10/17/2006 8:42 am |
and of course, FFA takes away the comment i origally left lol. go figure. great post man, and nice to read a little compilation from the peoples requests. Those facts you listed were both hilarious and interesting. Never put yourself down though for things you were or are into just because some dont think its "the norm". you sound like you are on the right track with your life man. I dont believe in the saying "Your actions define you." We all do stupid things, thats being human. What counts to me? Is what you do after you fuck up, how you pick yourself back up by your boot straps and soldier on. Thats what counts. Congrats on 400 Dude! TheDude.
| |||
10/17/2006 12:11 pm |
Congratulations on your 400th post, [would have liked to have read the others]
| |||
|
I remember those Sister_Act days....seems like a life time ago! If I remember rightly, I was the "note passer" for you...hehe!! Congrats on your 400th Post Twin Brother. Frangi x
| |||
|
It's been one hell of a ride and can't wait to see you find everything you are looking for and deserve. Congrats on 400!
| |||
|
I couldn't have asked for a better post... and thanks for answering my question... by the by, I just wanted to highlight one other change... just so you can pat yourself on the back for me.... You are drinking less... and that is probably a good thing. Hugs Artistic
| |||
|
Lovely way to honor your 400. I'd love to sit down with you sometime and just pick your brain...(perhaps get a quickie feel of that fabulous ass). I would perhaps tell you that once you have learned to love yourself, love will come to you. Hmmm...might even have to teach you that redheads are pretty cool too. LOL Truly though...great post. Blessed be lil sweet ass man. {=} I make mistakes, I am out of control & at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~Marilyn
| |||
|
"Why did it stop"...cause there were too many people to pass notes too TB!! hehe!! Frangi x
|
Become a member to create a blog
