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| Blogs > gottaring > Out of the Mouth of a Babe... |
GottaDork?
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GottaDork? I'm a total dork. Really. This whole 'Sex Kitten' thing is a facade. I'm a Dork of the Highest Order. I trip, I spill, I snarf and I burp. I just painted my fingernails Packer green  . I rarely wear makeup and I haven't bothered with panties since I started getting waxed. I've often wondered if a VO5 Hot Oil treatment would work on my landing strip, though. But I'm too chicken to try it.When I take pictures, I laugh when I look at the results. And I don't mean, 'giggle, giggle'. I mean, "HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!". I also laugh at the E*Trade baby, but that's because one day, he's going to exhaust his own trust fund because his parents didn't invest it properly. I have to sit with my back to the wall, not the door. I am deaf in my left ear. I won't let my see me naked. I still call my father 'Daddy'. I believe in God and the IRS. I am indignant about the price of gas. I hate my minivan. I won't at eat Cracker Barrel because they have discriminatory hiring practices. I won't answer the door if I'm not expecting you. I Love CornNuts, but only the original flavor. I want to sit for jury duty, but the only time I got called was before I became a citizen. I vote and I get mad at people who can, but choose not to. I pay all my bills before they are due. I make my own pasta and sushi. I can't chew gum because I have a trick jaw. My socks have holes in them. My baseball hats are not accessories- they're required uniform. So is my iPod armband (it's pink, natch). I sing along with the radio when I cook/ drive/ masturbate. I assign housework to certain days of the week. I let my eat cereal for dinner when Hubby is out of town. My wine charms are purses and high heel shoes. I own a gun. I shook Billy Joel's hand and he divorced Christie Brinkley two days later. Just sayin'. I talk to my plants and all my appliances have names. My dishwasher, Delilah, is my favorite, but I wouldn't admit it to the others. My vibrator is named 'Jeff'. I have six identical 'little black dresses' in five different sizes. They're all too big. I cried when I sold my crib set to my laser hair aesthetician. I have an unnatural addiction to chapstick, Mandarin Orange body lotion from Bath and Body Works, lime LaCroix and peanut M&Ms. I can't step over someones outstretched feet because I believe it's bad luck. I believe that everything can fixed with a combination of Love, food and duct tape. I'm a germphobe- that's why I wash out Delilah and Warren (the washing machine) at regular intervals. I used to be a model, but I was one of those 'difficult' ones. I used to say, "THAT'S what you want me to wear? Are you blind or just stupid?". The agency didn't like that too much. I'm also short and I like to eat without regurgitating immediately afterward, so.... My point? Don't have one. I ramble incoherently, too. Especially when there is vodka involved. But I figure you should know who you're dealing with  .When it comes to sex, I need a STRONG connection. Otherwise, the page just keeps buffering and takes FOREVER to load... |
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GOOD
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u da shit... and i know it !!!
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Admitted Dorks are more fun because they're honest (cuz a lot of people are a dork deep down inside but are too egotistical to admit it). I played clarinet in Marching Band so I think that about covers it. One time in band camp...
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Im a newbie to your blog but love the idea, great post GR If it was good, its great but if it was bad then you call that experience E-4-N
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Thanks! And I happened to think Anna Nicole was hot in a buxom drunk trailer-trash kind of way. Take it easy, guns are cold. 
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I knew you had to be a dork when you said you liked my blog. Dead give-away. All those things make you real and likable. Not a dork. Except for my blog. Dork! Most people are other people... FUCKING CHARACTER LIMIT!!! ~Oscar Wilde
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2/6/2012 4:56 pm |
Thanks for the compliment, and yes, I did search your blog for a reply because I too AM A HUGE DORK! I think back to the 70s swingers' "key parties" and conclude it's safe to assume that anyone who uses the web for dating or sex is one of us. A few compliments of my own: you're an incredibly sexy dork and an all around beautiful person and I enjoy reading your posts. Now don't let this flatter you too much, but I used my only 100 points to view your profile just to see what you had to say. So far mine has not received much positive feedback so it's refreshing to hear this site worked magic for you
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PS I LOVE the new profile pic, really gorgeous! Kisses, LA   
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We dorks are so very sexy and lovable! It's good to embrace our dorkness. Kisses, LeeAnn Kisses, LA
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2/6/2012 10:05 am |
Actually, it just makes you sound more unique and lovable. Also, way to go with the self-love of the ass thing ... looking good momma!!! Love the new pic.
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We share many of the same things/habits/likes and dislikes...but then I wouldn't have expected less...I think that makes you normal, not wierd...lol...normalcy is by the way the state of being like others...so I have finally found an "other" Yay!
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Hey, thanks for the info! Nice to know I'm talking to a dork like me! It makes the whole former model thing a little less intimidating! Take it easy! Guns are cold.Take it easy, guns are cold.
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'giggle giggle' is so... well I find it pretentious, fake. HAHAHAHAH has a 'joie de vivre' in it, a healthy view to life, a woman who knows what she wants and what she does not want!!! A woman who knows how to laugh, is the sexiest being! 
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I'm a bit of a dork myself. People insult me, but I'm not bright enough to notice  
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Takes a dork to appreciate a dork. Dork.
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'preciate today's smile
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You are like the rest of us living a life which we enjoy and want. Sorry. You are normal within the crazies. two cent for the day,  Cum to my blog and respond.  Have a great kissing fun time. 
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Hey now who ever said you can't be a sex kitten and a dork.  Nothing says it has to be one or the other.
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I had this all on tape already. Smart as a horse and hung like Einstein.
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They say great minds think?! ... erm ... "DO"!! alike? If you are a dork and I am semi sane, that might explain why I think you are so cool!! Great post!  Something interesting in my life: A surprise on my naked body this morning Come visit my blog to know what I get up to from time to time: [blog 4jasmine2]
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2/5/2012 7:49 am |
ha ha! That wasn't incoherent at all... did you go easy on the vodka then? (btw, everything you shared just makes you more real and endearing - if you consider those traits of a dork, then dorks rule )"I reject your version of reality & substitute my own" Offended Yet? Sign Here: [post 2929227] I mean seriously, DO IT!! Have you ever tried Sloggin' it? Blogger Slogger The best of some of the Canucks I love: [blog CanadaWeek]
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It all sound fairly normal to me...except the IRS thing. That's just crazy talk. 
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sign me up coach. nothing there that cant be overcome and really who doesnt have a few quirks about them. we cant all be sex machines some of us just have to be real too.
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Hmmm, if all that's true, I've got a dork you should meet. Jeff? seriously? .... not even going to ask what a laser hair aesthetician does... 
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2/5/2012 2:37 am |
But surely you can be a "sex kitten" with a little "dork" mixed in for good measure. Everyone needs a little dork in their personality Keeps everyone guessing and on their toes
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. I think you're pretty cool, too 
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