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A chuckle for the day  

pal334 69M  
51299 posts
8/7/2016 3:50 am

Last Read:
8/8/2016 3:06 am

A chuckle for the day

I hope more than one. I think a sense of humor is important. I am terrible telling jokes, because I can not hold back my laughter . Are you stoic enough to hold it together to tell a joke? Jokes are a good way to help you through a rough patch in life. Maybe just a way to tease a friend . I am not a politically person, but I don't like rude or hurtful jokes. So remember,,,, SET DOWN YOUR COFFEE BEFORE YOU READ THESE !!



A man was having<b> premature ejaculation </font></b>problems so he went to the doctor. The doctor said, "When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself." That same day the man went to the store and bought himself a starter pistol and ran home to his wife. That night the two were having sex and found themselves in the 69 position. The man felt the urge to ejaculate and fired the starter pistol. The next day he went back to the doctor who asked how it went. The man answered, "Not well. When I fired the pistol, my wife pooped on my face, bit three inches off my penis, and my neighbor came out of the closet with his hands in the air." -




Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, that's a mouthful." Sarah says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."



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SimpleLatina 59F
3447 posts
8/7/2016 4:40 am

I love those jokes. A morning laugh is good

Mickey Mouse is in the middle of a nasty divorce from Minnie Mouse. Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation. "I'm sorry Mickey, but I can't legally separate you two on the grounds that Minnie is mentally insane," said the judge. Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was mentally insane, I said that she's f*cking Goofy!"


ltrskr 75M

8/7/2016 5:47 am


veryfunnycple64 60M/60F
21770 posts
8/7/2016 5:47 am

made me chuckle that's for sure!

“Life is available only in the present moment.” Thich Nhat Hanh

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veryfunnycple64


hrdallnght4u 67M

8/7/2016 6:57 am

Awesome..

You can't expect to be Old & Wise..If You were never Young & Crazy!!!


Tmptrzz 61F  
107039 posts
8/7/2016 11:32 am

Lol.. good ones Pal thanks for the chuckles..

Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


sweet_VM 65F
81699 posts
8/7/2016 12:58 pm

ha ha Pal good one! ty for the laugh hugsssssssss V

Become a blog watcher sweet_vm


pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:09 pm

    Quoting SimpleLatina:
    I love those jokes. A morning laugh is good

    Mickey Mouse is in the middle of a nasty divorce from Minnie Mouse. Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation. "I'm sorry Mickey, but I can't legally separate you two on the grounds that Minnie is mentally insane," said the judge. Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was mentally insane, I said that she's f*cking Goofy!"
You have a good one there

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.” -

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:13 pm

    Quoting  :

I am happy you enjoy

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:14 pm



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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:15 pm

    Quoting  :

A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:16 pm

Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:16 pm

    Quoting  :

A man and woman had been married for 30 years, and in those 30 years, they always left the lights off when having sex. He was embarrassed and scared that he couldn't please her, so he always used a big dildo on her. All these years she had no clue. One day, she decided to reach over and flip the light switch on and saw that he was using a dildo. She said "I knew it, asshole, explain the dildo!" He said, "Explain the kids!"

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:18 pm

    Quoting  :

Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. Then he started looking in and under cars until a police man approached him and asked, "What are you doing?" "Playing a game," the boy replied. "What is your name?" the officer questioned. "Mind Your Own Business." Furious the policeman inquired, "Are you looking for trouble?!" The boy replied, "Why, yes."

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:19 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    Lol.. good ones Pal thanks for the chuckles..
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?" The engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:21 pm

    Quoting sweet_VM:
    ha ha Pal good one! ty for the laugh hugsssssssss V
Three guys are sitting in a sauna: a Mexican, an Asian, and a white guy. The Mexican and white guy are showing off their new tech gadgets. The white guy says, "Hey, look what I got: the new Google Glass!" The Mexican & Asian say, "Wow, that's nice, man." Then the Mexican guy says, "Check out my new cellphone; it's a watch!" The white guy and Asian say, "Very cool, dude." The Asian guy has nothing to show these guys, so he gets up and walks away naked to to the bathroom. Then he comes back 5 minutes later from the bathroom still naked with paper hanging out of his butt crack. The Mexican and white guy say, "Hey, you have something hanging out of your ass." The Asian guy says, "Oh look, I'm receiving a Fax!"

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
8/7/2016 3:25 pm

    Quoting  :

A gynecologist notices that a new patient is nervous. While putting on the latex gloves, he asks her if she knows how they make latex gloves. The patient says no. The doctor says, "There is a plant in Mexico full of latex that people of various hand sizes dip their hands into and let them dry. She does not crack a smile, but later she laughs. The doctor says, "What's so funny?" She says, "I'm imagining how they make condoms."

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scott6250 61M

8/7/2016 6:08 pm

LMAO!!!! Too funny!

"Sweet, steamy, sensuous kisses light the bright fires of passionate lust within us." scott6250


spunkycumfun 63M/69F
41171 posts
8/8/2016 9:06 am


Very good.

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