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| Blogs > Coeus1967 > Selfish Thoughts.... |
The One That Got Away
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The One That Got Away As I may have mentioned I am something of a pragmatist when it comes to FriendFinder-x, if it is meant to happen it will, if it doesn't then continue on your way. I did however have a recent experience I thought I might "share" to prove that even the most cynical, calculating and amoral of us can sometimes feel the pain too. I was exceptionally fortunate to stumble across a fellow mythical beast on here. We exchanged emails, "chatted" a little, uncovered a lot of common ground, flirted outrageously (but not graphically) and eventually made the leap of faith that led to an out of the way, pretty deserted, pub in the late afternoon. When we met the conversation flowed along with the wine and we both felt the spark that said - perhaps. As the second glass morphed in to the third this wonderful creature became more and more extravagantly physical. I chose to be the perfect gentleman and, while acknowledging the attraction I did not "take advantage" beyond a hand that slide slightly south as we kissed goodbye (chastely). As it turned out through subsequent communication this came as a slight surprise and disappointment to my partner in crime. While I assured her of the degree of physical attraction I felt I didn't apologise. I felt I had shown respect for both her and me. Anyway, misunderstandings overcome we met again - another out of the way pub, more glasses of wine bit this time a shared sofa in a secluded corner. As our conversation progressed so did our degree of intimacy. We kissed. Repeatedly. We caressed. Subtly... And then with perhaps a little less subtly. There was a palpable hunger on both sides but yet again we parted as only better friends with a rather less chaste kiss or four. So on we moved to arranging date three. While I avoided suggesting hotel bar there was a distinct impression that we might soon find ourselves removed from the reproving view of others. Our interaction have moved to a whole new level - perhaps had become probably and then BANG. Monday morning - a new email. It didn't actually start Dear John (since my name isn't John) but it had the same effect. An old ex lover had apparently appeared from far aware shores and she felt she needed to see just how far their connection might go. Ever the pragmatist I expressed my regret but wished her well on her journey. We can probably never be friends as there will always be a<b> sexual tension </font></b>so it was effectively goodbye. Ahh well you might think, life goes on. Problem is it did hurt. Not because I thought I had found the new love of my life but because of the death of possibility. The regret engendered by what I would now never know. I will never know how she tastes. I will never know what noise she would have made as I moved inside her, I will never know what she would have looked like naked on her knees in front of me with my cock in her mouth. I will never know what would have stimulated her to climax and how should would look as the wave overtook her. I will also never know where else our journey might have led. These may seem like very puerile regrets but even the most carnal amongst us invest something of ourselves in every one we decide to travel with. I already miss her company and I think I will always miss the opportunity we had together. Ho Hum. Life goes on. Though it may be a slightly less colourful life than it could have been. |
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