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Honest is the best policy...or is it?  

scoupe42 60M
6747 posts
4/6/2014 8:42 am

Last Read:
2/24/2022 8:14 am

Honest is the best policy...or is it?



Years ago I worked at a place, there was a trucker that came from Texas to drop off his load. He back up the truck and someone unload the truck. He always seem happy, but I could tell he's putting on an act, and he reek of booze. One night I was off my shift, and he drove up. I ask him, was everything OK? He always say yes. But I ask him to tell me the truth. He said, you got time. I told him, I'm off shift and have plenty of time. So we when in the break room, and have a cup of coffee. He started saying , he worked for this company since he was 18 years old. He asked his high school sweetheart to marry him and she say Yes. Their goal was to have three . They set a date for the wedding, and a week before he got married his buddies gave him a bachelor party. He said, he got a little tipsy that night a slept with one of the strippers. He told his buddies that he need to tell his wife to be about what happen. His buddies said, forget about it, don't tell her and go on with his life! So he and his wife to be got married. At this time he said, I was the happiest man alive, a great wife, a good job, two and a great home. By this time ten years passed. his wife was pregnant with their third . They always wanted to have three . He said, his conscience was still bothering him after all these years. He said, when he come home from road trip he was going to tell her what happened years ago. He told his wife what happen at the bachelor party ten years ago. He said, I was tipsy and I woke in the morning, and a stripper and I was in bed naked. He said, he never slept with anyone else, and his conscience been bothering him every since. He said, she stood there for a moment and gave him a stare. She said, I love you, you my husband , we going to work it out and I forgive you. He said, how bless he was for getting a second chance. So 20yrs later, he was preparing to retire. When they was in high school they talk about him getting a job and retire in 30yrs, by then the would be gone and they can travel and enjoy life. They were debt free, the house was paid and they had no bills at all, they both had nice cars. He told her, he was going to put in his paper for retirement, she said, that not a good idea, he said, why? She said, she wanted a divorce. he said, what happen, what did I do. He said, he forgot about the bachelor party, She said, you know why! You cheated on me before we got married. He told her, 20yrs ago, I told you what happened, you said you loved me and we were going to work things out! if you felted that way, why didn't you divorce me 20yrs ago. She said, I always wanted three and I wanted then with you. I wanted us to be a family and see them go to college and go on with their lives. You were a great father, excellent husband, but I can't forgive you for what happened. She said, we going to sell the house, anything in it you want you can have. Once the house is sold, I'm leaving the state and you will never see me again! She moved out, took her things and file for a divorce. So within a few months the house was empty and eventually the house sold. They had someone to do the paper for their money on the house, she got her share and he got his. He said, crying, please don't leave me we dated since we were in the 5th grade and you always been a part of my life, don't go! She said, it's over! He said, she kissed him for the last time and said, have a nice life! He said, I been now working for the company for 40yrs, still miss her, and never got re-married. I see the once in a while. I ask about their mom, they said the promise her that they wouldn't tell her where she at. After they were divorce two years, he heard that she got re-married. He said, he been unhappy since. In this world we taught to do the right thing no matter what is it. So my question is.....Honesty is the policy...or is it?

I have a question. If a person mess around before they are married, is that still adultery?

1of2dorks 53M
273 posts
10/14/2014 11:57 pm

You weave a very good yarn. That is a serious compliment, and I appreciate the telling. thanks for sharing it.
The question you pose at the end is a bit of a killer though. I have known a few guys who did something like this. though they did not last so long as he did, and went on to do other things in life. I feel for him as the thought of being honest is near and dear to my heart. And in my head, my mind tells me if all I had ever done were to come to the light of day, I would have few friends left in this world. And those too would look at me sideways.
While the honesty is appealing and will purge the soul of the hurt the conscience is inflicting on it, the mind knows that to tell exposes you to retribution for an act. In this case, the loss of one he loved dearly, and without reservation.
That this was done when he was drinking, and at a bachelor party gives more food for thought on how some folks should not attend those functions. Especially considering his previous and post fidelity to that one incident. But as anyone who drinks knows, when you pick up that bottle, you set down your inhibitions, and a lot of sense.
On the last about adultery, I am not sure. I would suspect in the eyes of the law, it would not have been. But that is supposition on my part. Once they took their vows though, it would be a different ball park. Staying on the straight and narrow path after that point is something else again, and it sounds as if he lived up to and exceeded that. Again, this I think falls into the realm of legalese, and as I am no lawyer, this area is unclear to me.
Again, good story and thank you for sharing. it is good food for thought.


scoupe42 60M

10/5/2014 10:41 am

I felt bad for him too.


sweet_VM 65F
81699 posts
4/6/2014 4:30 pm

Scoupe what every happens at a bachelor party stays with the group. They weren't married yet and you never know how the other half will see it.

What stays in Vegas stays in Vegas.. old saying goes.

Some things are better off not being said. That too bad they ended up in divorce. I am sure if he told her before the wedding there would not have been one.. hugs V

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