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I'm Not A Fucking Library Book  

Dark_Wolfmoon 47F  
35 posts
9/2/2016 11:20 pm
I'm Not A Fucking Library Book


I was raised to always have a plan, or twelve. (Sometimes plans change.)

I was raised to maintain a schedule as best I can. (Sometimes schedules change.)

I was also raised to keep to the first obligation I agreed to, whenever possible, especially if I gave my word.

I was raised that the only thing that happens last minute is an emergency.

I was raised that the only folks worth bending the rules for won't ever ask or expect you to do so. (VERY important bit to remember.)

Where does all of this stem from?

I was speaking to a young man several months ago, someone I was crushing on pretty hard (and I still kinda am, but the douchiness is rather thick with this one), when suddenly all communication ceased. POOF!Just like that. In fact, we had been working on finding a mid-point to meet up so we could chat one another up before possibly shagging each other silly. (Safety second, you know...)

I figured something came up, some sort of emergency or life issue, and waited for a week to hear from him, to see if there would be any more conversation on meeting up. A week went by, nothing. Two weeks, nothing. A month, nothing. Seems like he ghosted. Well, shit. This was starting to feel familiar.

So I took a deep breath, squared my shoulders, and continued down my path... sans good-looking hottie Veteran with a libido from Hades. Meh. Here we are, over 6 months down the road, and he's in my inbox again asking to meet up because he will be in my neck of the woods this weekend. That's all fine and dandy. But remember what I said earlier about how I was raised? I already had plans for this weekend. My nephew got his first set of hunting tags and I'm taking him out to scout some spots. I'll be off grid the entire day Saturday.

I was given a "maybe next time" and then stony silence after I responded, And I even offered an open door for conversation in hopes of getting things back on track between he and I. Apparently, conversation was NOT on the agenda.

Pity. It coulda been something.

Frankly, I'm disappointed.

I'm different.
I will give you my treasure chest of darkness first. If you can handle that, then I'll bring out my shining moons. If one cannot handle the darkness, then one should not deserve the light. I have no interest in "trapping" anyone in a silken web.
I have no silken web. - C. Joybell C.


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