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Revenge - part I
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Revenge - part I Me and my girlfriend have been together about six years. It was really great, just like in romantic movies. We loved each other, took care of each other, had a good sex and we were best friends. Of course, like in any other relationship, we had our good and bad days. There were not much arguments, but when there were, they were fierce and short, so that after a couple of hours the fight ended and we realized again how stupid we were, because we were fighting for any extraneous stuff that is mostly pushed by our ego and malice. The positive thing was that we always found a compromise, and there were no struggles over dominance and<b> authority </font></b>over each other. In these cases we were always trying in some way to sort this common male-female problem and to communicate within the common reason. The problem arose the next two years, when we finally decided to live together. From the economic point of view there were no obstacles, since my business flourished at that time. It was very difficult to maintain an independence and economic property in todays Bosnia. But I made it at that period. With the love that drove us in our lives, it was a natural cause to move together. It seemed like the next big step for us and our relationship. walk into a new life together with my loved one. For her, it was a problem. She was 25 years old and 7 years younger than me. Since all her life she was not separated from her parents. The new environment and independence created a sort of a shock for her. Although it appeared to me that this was normal for her and that after a few months she would adjust herslef as time passed on, the situation grew worse and worse... First, she began to feel lonely, because I spent the whole day at work. When I got home from work, then I often worked extra at home and slowly, as time passed again I neglected her and ignored her emotional issues. Although I was aware of that, I was a workaholic and I have always had in mind that you should dedicate more time for the two of us, but it rarely happened. At that time, her father became ill. She became depressed at times. We began to fight frequently over stupid issues, but our relationship became more tense and intense. Even once, she left me after a fight, moved back to her parrents house and the next day we reconciled. I tried to understand her and to take more time for her, to balance the situation with good sex, but it wasn't that efficient as I though of it. It would always cheer her up and alleviate the stress she experienced, but deep inside she was sad and lonely. As I said, sex until then was excellent. We tried all sorts of poses. We were very fiery and passionate in our power play, but she never alowed me to try her anally. She fantasized about it to try sex with one more man, especially with an elder one, but I could not manage with myself to that kind of thing. I was too possesive. Altough, I did thought of it and was very excited. I also fantasised that we enter a passionate game with another girl. Since she was bisexual, she already had such an experience before, but was not very arosed by that. Since she loved me a lot, she wanted to give me that gift, but we could not find a girl who would agree to that, so it was just an empty fantasy for me. To come out from the daily routine, after so many years spent together, we practiced sex in the open and we were trying to find new positions that would be of interest to us. All this was interesting for a while, however, her father's health deteriorated and she began to fantasize frequently about how she would like to have sex with an older man and her feelings toward me cooled. "Oedipus complex", she said. Since her father was about 50 years older than her, she had the urge to find a man who is also a lot older than her and so she thought it would compensate her strong urges for the love of her sick father. To me, it all seemed a bit unreal or I did not want to understand it fully, so I mostly ignored that feeling of her. In the past year, my business has become unbearable. The money I was getting was lower, but I gained more stress. All around me was tense. she could sense the anxiety in the air, and our arguments were heard all by the neighbors. We avoided each other, because even the smallest criticism or argument turned into a fight. Any bigger argument made no longer any sense, because it would transform itself into a war. Any tension would be ended by silence, so as not to hurt each other with words. We were getting less and less tender to each other. Sex was becomming an issue as well. The passion as no more... I was very phlegmatic at some point. I left the old job and was looking for a new one. Everything didn't mattered to me anymore. She often went out with her frineds, while I stayed home and annoyed myself because I had no one else to annoy. Simply, she avoided me, and I understood that. I wasn't going to make it anymore worse for her. She was working in the press, so she had to have a lot of acquaintances, friends, men and women, some of whom were mostly business associates. Since by nature she's a social person and communication was normal for her, there was no need for jealousy on my part, although there were a lot of candidates that were trying to seduce her. After all, there existed a common trust after so many years spent together. After 3 months of my bad influence to our relationship, I finally found a new job. Things began to get better. Also to her. She struggled about some things in her career, and that things started to get better, as well. At that pouint she told me one memorable sentence: "The things are getting better for and this is a new beginning for us!". That sentence I gladl accepted when I went on a business trip to Zagreb with my new colleagues. Although the trip lasted only three days, I could not wait to get home and start new life in a new life with my beloved. But nothing seemed as it was... |
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