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Linda Tiffany Vista - My Life From 6 to 16
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Linda Tiffany Vista - My Life From 6 to 16 I was 6, my brother and I went the local Smith Crisp factory's Christmas party. "Ok now get in line, you 2 get blue wrapped presents". My turn and given a present , I unwrap it and find a large doll. Is this right? Its taken from me and receive another blue present. Its a wagon train with some Calvary. Now 8, I still don't get the gist why some girls wore dresses and some like me wore shorts,. Its April and my birthday and at the party my dad takes a photo while I sit next to my girlfriend, I go red in the face. Mum said ah he's blushing. All I could think of was I just wanted to try on her pretty party dress. Is it not my turn to wear a dress yet? When I was , I thought something wasn't quite right. Its difficult put into words. I had heard stories at school, something about not being born right? As you know youngsters think differently about things any way. So I decided to act on the stories. I asked my dad if I could see my birth certificate. I made up some rubbish for the reason (he wasn't too pleased about though). He got the certificate out and showed me. Looking at , I made some comment for cover. I had seen what I had wanted. Walking away, I said thank you and went my bedroom. I cried and cried. had said; "". I just was amazed and couldn't sort out in my mind. The next few days passed. had got me, and I thought, NO! Its got be wrong, or somethings just not right with it. So I made plans experiment for the future. I saved all my pocket / birthday / Christmas , also any i earned. I also went the old part of the area I lived at in Coddington Notts and collected lots of Brambles (Large Wild Blackberries) and went around the married quarters selling them, I made quite a lot of from that. A short time later while I was at Mount Lane School Newark I overheard 2 teachers talking about wine, and wanting Rose-hips. I was cheeky and asked them what they were. If they was what I thought I said I may be able get a lot for them, They described what they were and i said I would bring in a handful of what i could get. Next day after collecting some again from the old RAF ruins at Coddington, I took in a few and showed them to the 2 teachers. "How many could I get"? they asked, "give me over the weekend and I will bring in as many as I can carry". Monday came I was overloaded with the damn things, they had better make it worth it I thought. "All collected legal and above board," I said, as they gave me , I didn't realise I could get that much, blimey that much? So nothing was suspected about buying stockings and pantyhose, I hid them by stuffing them down the front of my shirt, and of course still bought my comic and sweets every Saturday down Appletongate while Dad bought the Fish and Chips from the shop opposite. Once I remember I nearly got caught wearing pantyhose and knickers. It was a Saturday morning, mum and dad had gone to Newark to do the weeks shopping, so I did as usual and locked the kitchen door (the done thing in those days was not to lock your door if you was in). Then I went upstairs and got my things and went into the toilet to put them on. I loved the feeling it gave me, then all of a sudden, I heard the kitchen door handle being tried, then banging on the door. It was dad shouting my , as soon as that had started I took off the pantyhose and knickers and got my trousers back on, stuffing them into my pocket, I ran down stairs and unlocked the door. Dad screamed at me "why you locked the door"? I said, "I had go the toilet and knew I was going to be a long time", "well don't lock the door again" ! he yelled. That was so close, not seen dad so mad with me since I had, with my brother at a previous home, burnt all the grass covering an old air raid shelter nearby, ouch, the belt we had, we knew never to do that again. We moved from Coddington a few months later a village near Lincoln. When I was 14, I wrote a list out and went Lincoln with my parents. They went normal household shopping, I said I was going Boots and Ruddock's (they sold records etc. then). I actually went close a department store with a women's lingerie area the store was called Mawer and Collingham, with my list. I went to the lingerie department and asked a lady assistant for help. Showing the list of things which my "girlfriend" had dared me to get for her. I had written down knickers, stockings, suspender belt and bra, suggested makes also sizes and the colour black I had in mind but I was lucky with the as the assistant had spoken her supervisor and took pity on my dilemma with the I had and gave me a discount. When I put on my new lingerie. ( wasn't a fetish thing not that I knew that word anyway). just felt natural. I had a hell of a time hiding the things. I wrapped them in my normal clothes and had make sure I kept all my 3 drawers in 6 drawer chest spotless so mum would just leave well alone. In the next 2 years until I started work I kept on club books keeping an eye on female fashion, making notes of what worked with what. I, as all youngsters started on a low wage. But I didn't want cheap as I had started with nice things Wonderbra, and other known makes. still cover myself I bought my comic and sweets and still put a on 1 side for renewing MY lingerie. I again on an idea, help make things a more affordable. That was going be around my 16th birthday, and would change the way I thought from then on. But sadly something was about happen a few weeks before my 16th that nearly finished me off as a person. I ran into HATE in a bad way, changed my life. Trouble is so many bad people nothing happens too them, mores the pity. I left school when I was 15. in the summer of 1971. I really wanted to go stay on for my 16th and then go to college in Lincoln for design for clothes etc. It was a waste of time saying to my parents. So I had no idea what I wanted to do. Dad âÂÂsuggestedâ a job. I did a foolish thing and did that, and followed my brother into, stupid stuff that I had no idea about. Gas fitting apprentice, totally wrong job for me. With that I had to go to Grantham College for City and Guilds certificate. That's where the trouble started. Well, its March 1972. In the class at Grantham. 1 was from Sleaford and 1 from Spalding then 6 of us from Lincoln. I started to get bullied from 2. I was the youngest by a few months and with a couple a year difference. It got worse. I hated going, it took me ages to get up in the mornings, for dad to take us into Lincoln for work, me going into Guymers mini bus, what a heap of junk, for want of a better word, to go to the college. Why were they doing this? Because they could, god knows why, I tried all the things I used to do to fit in at school. Make jokes, do silly dares, anything. But what ever I tried wasn't good enough. They were just bullies. I asked my brother, he was in his second year of apprenticeship. All he said was cards with them at lunch time. I tried that once and it made it worse. I asked my granddad, it was nigh impossible for me talk dad. Granddad said I had stand up them both but with backup from 1 of the Lincoln lads I could trust. I asked Nigel was just a month or 2 older and we had joined together .we had to take a certain test and we had helped each other, damn silly test, bending a copper wire to a plan. Nigel said they were asking for trouble and he said he would back me up. So I picked a day and confronted them both .asking then what their problem was with me, they said they just didn't like me. Nigel then pushed me to 1 side and went in front of both of them really close. He looked at them and said they would go through him first and nudge them with his chest. Nigel was into karate or something, and the 2 backed down, he turned to me and said let me know "my given " if a problem, and I will lay them both out, or something like that. I thought, thank god, sorted. Was I wrong! Next damn day Nigel went off ill. Then unbeknownst me the 2 got the other 4 on one side and said as a prank they were get me. The 6 grabbed me, and took me to the work area where installations by us went on. They got me face down, and they stapled and nailed me down by my work clothes and gas board jacket. I was shouting and struggling but I just couldn't free myself. The 2 then said to the others 4 in the area to go, straight away I thought, Oh here comes a good kicking. I was so frightened, I shouted for help from them. They just laughed. Here we go, just take , go loose and dead. But that wasn't going be . What are they doing with my clothes? OH MY GOD TheyâÂÂre not? Then the calling Started â¦â¦â¦â¦BITCH, YOU BITCH over and over. But they did, they both got in me. They hurt. I just wanted it end. My mind went blank. I did my best struggle, I really did. They must really hated me. They got me by my collar, and twisted my head around. I had then beg for my life. I did. The first and LAST time I will EVER do that! They let one on my arms free. I cant remember some of . How I cleaned up and how I got up, god knows? I was hurt, hurt so bad, my mind was all over the place. I don't even remember the later part of the afternoon or the Guymers taxi back Lincoln or the bus from Unity Square my home village. I remember walking in and mum saying hi, whatâÂÂs happened your jacket its got holes in? I just said hi and went up my bedroom. I was going get them all back. I WANTED HURT THEM! So I got my thoughts in order and what happened after, I didn't care. I went Grantham and didn't speak anyone. At lunch time I walked into the Grantham town centre from the college and went to a few chemists. I had to make my scheme work. I had the 1 chance , and had work right. Coffee and Tea break in the afternoon came. Hi guys I said, can I apologize for being an idiot? I tapped my head, IâÂÂm stupid, I said. Can I make you all a coffee? I really am sorry. Is that ok? So off I went and got the coffees, made them just a tad stronger than normal, put sugars where needed. Opened up my flap on my new jacket, (I had 2 of each originally) I reached in my pocket and pulled out a few packets of chocolate laxative. YOU JUST WAIT YOU FUCKING BASTARDS! I put a full bar in each mug and let them dissolve. I topped up with a more boiled water. Here you are guys; I grabbed mine first off the tray, and all chatted. I glanced up at the 2 and I had a job not saying anything, but I just smiled at them. They all drank, as I did but my own clear one. A short while after started work. In the end, 1 of the 2 and 1 of the other 4 didn't make the toilet. And shall I just say the other 4 were not well, and leave at that. I had fucked THEIR asses up. And screwed them, but not literal. Is that the life for me? No I could not bare the thought. I was hurting physically and mentally. Oh God, what do I do? Can I Survive? Is this it? I can't keep crying, do I tell? Now I hear the words in my dreams. Bloody fag, queer, scum, dirty bastard, YOU BITCH! No I can't be, can I? Do I tell dad, I hurt, should i see the doctors? No its back to me, a lad, under 16. I cant go out, mum says I'm so quiet. Its hell, my mind is in turmoil. I tell my parents I hate work. I need to get away from the hate, I hurt. I cry, Jesus, what do I do? Got to tell bosses I hate college, move me No they can't, things said by them to me, don't help. Decide, I need to decide. Tell Dad I am no good at job, that will satisfy A week later I had a meeting with bosses of the apprentices. They knew something had happened but not what. I leave, Dad signs me off the apprenticeship. Dilemma, what now? Wait. That's it !!!!! I wait. (I was always wanting to go out after my 16th Birthday which was in April.). I wasn't thinking it would be coz of some hatred towards me. Not long and find out, is the world just HATE for me? 16 years and 2 days. it was a Saturday, I went to Lincoln Dressed I found out, I was loved, if you could love. I will keep living, but Is this all is though? I need find myself. Well I had a few weeks realise I had do something find out if any one loved me or was I just a loser like those 2 in the Grantham College said as they forced themselves on me. 16 years and 2 days old, was a Saturday. Dressed in my hidden lingerie, trousers and jacket covers well, went into Lincoln and to the toilets near the Highbridge , High Street, just down the few steps. I know seedy, but I needed to find out if I was attractive or if I was just a BIG LOSER. I set up in 1 of the toilets. Took off my outer clothes, I was shaking. Took off my outer socks and put on 2" women's heels. Is be HATE ? Looking in a stained mirror. I see a pretty lady, is that me? Nice in black stockings, Black bra, suspender belt and also Panties to match, 2 inch ladies shoes to finish off the ensemble.. I open my bag. Durex, bottle of Cresta, Napkins, Vaseline( jees never use that again heats up and can make you sore) inch bamboo stick for protection, just in case stop getting hurt, also a folded bag which i put my trousers, shirt, jacket and shoes in. Hearing someone, I open the door. What the hell am I doing? My need to find out wins. I lean up on the door side, and try to sexy. "hey lovey ", I say. Things begin blur with time what exactly happened, I remember a . Well in the 2 hours on that Saturday I had sexual liaisons with 8 guys. I remember. 4, I wanked off. 3, I sucked. The last sucked me off, he also stuck 2 fingers in my ass as he held me close. He was very nice and kind as were all the others. 1 had a sexy chat and asked if he could see me again and bring me a present. He also asked if he could me the as his wife, (that was a bit strange at the time, but has happened many times after). Some wanted kiss, that was the first time I had tongues shoved into my mouth. (still seems strange even now). I looked into all their eyes, and for those moments I was with them, I got the answer I had so dared to dream of. They loved me, (not love as later I did with my wife) but it wasn't dirty or sordid, they didn't force me to do anything I didn't want to, unlike sadly weeks previously at college. Varying in size their cocks mostly had foreskins (i had touched and sucked a friend 2 years earlier, ..ask me about it if you want). Their hearts were mine. I saw I had some special effect on them Sounds so big headed, but I don't mean it to be. They all wanted to give me something.. I was pleased, and I said ok so I could some supper on the way home and a taxi. Afterwards I had some left replacement panties etc later. Vary amounts 50 pence, ã1, ã2. I got ã.50, total. (My new wage where I went to work was ã6.50 for 40 hours). All that just for 2 hours? I didn't upon as being a or anything else other than what I had suggested as a thank you Then put my over clothes over my knickers that i had put back on and took off my bra leaving my other lingerie in place. After cleaning up the cum that was around me and swilling mouth out for the last time. Close to pm went Broadgate chippy and felt great. I sat in the back restaurant, basically alone eating a lovely fish and chips supper, and my head was spinning. What had I achieved? I WAS LOVED. (well they were all very kind, that was what i wanted "kindness"). I cried with joy in my bedroom after the taxi home. |
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