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A fantasy for me
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A fantasy for me I came on line today and was checking out some blog posts. I came a cross a blog by bobbiejoe. I really liked her writing and some of her subjects, I was really interested in her story about her and her mom. It really hit home with me. I had a dom for a mom and I spent so much time wanting to please her. It didn't really understand what made me this way as a cd but as I began looking into my motivation for being a gurl I realized that my mom was the driving force. As I had noted in my earlier blog posts i was raised with 3 sisters and it was easy for me to identify with them. i was when i reached puberty obsessed with girls as any young man would be. I had girl friends most of my life even in elementary school. I would rather be with girls then guys. Most of my friends were my sisters friends. I fantasized about being at sleepovers being apart of that group to sit and gossip and tell stories. Every once in a while I did get invited and most who knew me didn't object and they take freely. As I got older I was not able to join in since i was a boy. It was not my happiest times. I spent a lot of my time in my room and I liked to touch myself thinking of being dressed up. I had my secret stash of panties and bras and gowns. I would pretend i was feminine. i did get caught by my mom as she found some panties in my bed. She had punished me so many times for defiling myself and having unclean thoughts. I think I was getting turned on more by the punishments then the clothes. The day she found the panties I was so humiliated. She even took me to my sisters room and showed her what I had been doing. It embarrassed me to no end. My sister started calling a pervert and she threatened to out me to friends at school. Mom wasn't going to let her but I had to face my perverted ways. She had me get on the bed and she pulled my pants down in front of my sister. She handed sis the hair brush and told her from now on she would be the one to give the spankings to me. Well sis at first wasn't sure if she could do it but mom insisted. Sis took the brush and hit my bare ass. Mom said now Nan you need to really crack his ass he took your panties and played with himself leaving cum stains on them.. I bet he would put them back wet when done. Mom looked at me didn't you boy. I hung my head and said yes. Nan was so upset when she heard that she screamed at me "you perv I was wearing soiled Panties" Yes I said. She raised the hairbrush and slammed in on my ass. She kept hitting me as mom grinned and made her continue. She not only beat my ass she caught my balls several times making it even more excruciating. i screamed begging mom to have her stop. Nan stopped only to pull her panties she had been wearing all day and shoved them in my mouth. She says you like dirty underwear you suck on these perv. Make sure you taste the scuff marks too. I wasn't enjoying any of this but it wasn't going to stop as it went on for a long time. When i finally ended my ass and balls were burning. Nan took out here Polaroid and took pics she said to show her friends. i was really hurting and I looked at mom. She took me by the arm and back to my room. She was so a shamed me and she had me ly on the bed the rest of the day naked with the door open so all could see the shame. i would endure this punishment many times after this until I left for college. Despite the humiliation I continued do wear panties and bras for many years after. i wore my wife's clothes advancing from underwear to<b> dresses </font></b>and gowns. I would dress and think of what I felt like back then. Now I am 65 and my obsession has made me want to completely become a woman. I seek out men who like gurls like me. I want to be controlled and taken by men. One of my biggest fantasies is have a woman take real charge of me and give me the mom fantasy. i want to give in and be taken by a strong lady and live out my strong feeling of pleasing mom sexually. It is so hot of a fantasy that as I write this I am hard and playing with my clitty. I may never have that fulfilled but it is still burning inside of me. I did have one experience which came pretty close. A woman I knew at work.was built so much like my mom. BBW type big tittes and big ass. I became a close friend of her's.and when my first marriage was failing she was there to talk to. A mutual friend set us up one night. He invited me to dinner and unbeknownst to me invited Leila. As the night went on and a few too many glasses of wine.. We found ourselves discussing our pasts. I was really enjoying her company. It got late so Leila announced she was leaving. I walked her to the car and we chatted. I leaned over and gave here a peck on the cheek. She grabbed my face and landed a strong kiss on my lips and proceeded to open my mouth with her tongue. I had never been so aggressively kissed like that before. She whispers in my ear that she had more to give me at her place. Well off we went and for the next few hours I was being controlled like never before We hardly had been at her place a short few minutes and she garbs my arm and pulls me to the bedroom. She is sitting on the bed and tells me that she needs to be satisfied. She tells me to undress and to ly on my back on the bed. I of course do as I am told. she says I hope you don't mind but you are mine for the night. She takes some neck ties from a drawer and begins to tie me to her bed. She leaves me there and goes to change. she comes back and she is almost naked except for leather panties and bra. She climbs up on the bed and is just inches from my mouth with her pussy.. Then put of no where she says mommy needs her boy to clean her dirty pussy. Well there I am licking a really wet smelly pussy. She is not hardly letting me breath. She fucks me mouth. she finally reaches a really big orgasm. Her release is so loud I am sure the neighbors could hear. i was so tuned on. She sits down next to me and tells me you really like tasting your mommy don't you. I look at her and tell her it is one of my fantatsies. She smiles and laughs at me telling me she knew I was a mamas boy. She begins to play with me and asks if my mom had ever played with my dick or balls. I said yes but mostly she spanked me.. She asked how many years did she do it and I told until i left home at 21. She smiled well now I must take her place. She ask me if I liked the idea and I told her yes. I was getting so urned on. She played with me but warned me not to cum. She found a dildo and played with it on my balls. As the night went on she spent as much time as she could humiliating me.. She eventually untied me turned me over and with out even asking shoved the dildo in my ass. she fucked me hard as I protested. She then was in complete control. I had given in to her and just let it happen...The best sex of my life. Late the next morning she gave me permission to jerk off which I did with great relief, She captured my cum and had me eat it. In my mind it was fitting. i was becoming a complete sub before I even knew what one was. In the end we ended the relationship as she grew tired of me. The final humiliation as she tossed me away. I haven't stopped thinking of this and I want to someday experience that felling again. Thank You bobbiejoe for sharing Peace and love friends. Kisses from jennifer. |
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