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The Making of a Natural Submissive
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The Making of a Natural Submissive After 20 in the lifestyle, it becomes clear how hard it is distinguish character flaws and strengths from the roles we live. I am submissive naturally. If that is so, then why did I not become dominant? It clearly was not a choice I made. It was how I was be. I knew it deep within, early in life.  My mother was very domineering in a narcissistic parental way. After much introspection, I believe this is why I became naturally submissive. How did I come this hypothesis? Because as a mother, I knew that my passive way of parenting likely was the cause of my own showing narcissistic domineering behavior early on. It came as I watched her . She would be the more dominant one in her relationships. Was I the cause of that? I wondered. While investigating this, I ran across a study done and published on Dominant Behavior Systems (DBS) in Behavioral Psychology DBS is a system used explain behaviors in place with humans in social, emotional, and relationship structures in their lives based on rewards and punishments. It is the amount of effort and effectiveness with which a human will get their needs and desires met, get enrichment and lives balanced without being punished and getting a reward for their behavior. Am I losing you yet with my geeky inner thoughts? Follow me down the rabbit hole...you can just focus on the little<b> bunny </font></b>tail  Parental Styles: Basically DBS, involves parenting styles 1. Passive 2. Aggressive 3. Assertive Limits describe whether a parent uses passive, assertive, or aggressive discipline. Passive discipline tends be hands off parenting; assertive discipline is self-assured and shows respect for others creating a win-win outcome for the parent and ; while aggressive discipline is said be “ school” with techniques such as smacking, using a wooden spoon, and yelling. Example: My mother was an aggressive parent in discipline, I became a submissive out of anxiety and low self esteem issues begin with, That is not negative as long as you deal with those issues, My parenting was more passive in that I allowed my mother and master make all the rules and I just mitigated, which would account for raising a naturally dominant . Her negative traits would include narcissistic tendencies and a power driven reward system. Again, not a given but as long as you strive learn, you recognize the tendencies. And if they were a single parent, as mine was, that influences the equation even more. Now of course there will be variables. We are humans. You may have a passive parent and an aggressive role model/disciplinarian. You may have an aggressive parent who left you with a passive caretaker or worse an Un-involved parent completely. There can be traumas that occured that alter the psyche. So many what ifs....But, I bet my bottom dollar that being naturally anything is a combination of nature, and nurture.... And so the cycle goes... We are now at the end of the rabbit hole. Follow the<b> bunny </font></b>tail and tell ... Do you think this theory has merit? What was your parent's or your parenting style? What have been the results?  |
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