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Blogs > rm_longliner002 > longliner002 My Blog

Joke: A Redneck Valentine  

rm_longliner002 57M
135 posts
2/4/2007 7:04 am

Last Read:
2/5/2007 7:58 am
Joke: A Redneck Valentine

Joke: A Redneck Valentine
Collards is green
my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky
to have a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like cornsilk
a-flapping in the breeze
Softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.

You have som'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high
when we're in a crowd.

On special occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
what I did to deserve
such a purdy, young doe.

Like a good roll of duct tape
yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants
I found in my bed.

Cut from the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up my life
more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
my life is complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
we go together
like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses
on that special day
from the cooler at Kroger.
"That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,
these won't do.
Cause yo're too special,
you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift,
without taste nor odor,
more useful than diamonds...

IT'S A NEW TROLLIN' MOTOR!!

Yipeeee....Yee Ha!

rm_longliner002 57M
227 posts
2/4/2007 9:06 am

 Glad you enjoyed the jokes.


rm_stormimajik 51F
129 posts
2/4/2007 9:08 am

 About time you two made it official!

As for everyone else welcome to the group, post and enjoy hope to see everyone at the M&G.


rm_freaksinheat 47M/46F
Ask me for a photo
12 posts
2/4/2007 11:21 am

 This was great.

Stormi baby, I Think you posted to the wrong page. I think we've all done that some time.


rm_longliner002 57M
227 posts
2/4/2007 9:56 pm

 thank you for your comments everyone.
stop by again


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