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| Blogs > SilyconBond > I'm a dumpster fire |
Weird bathroom encounter.
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Weird bathroom encounter. This post is only viewable by FriendFinder-x members. Join FriendFinder-x now! |
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Ok, I know next to nothing about Celebrities. The only one I ever talked to one on one for over 5 min was jazz trumpeter Maynard Ferguson on a flight from Chicago back in the ’90s. I don’t watch TV as a general rule. I don’t follow social media. I know next to nothing about sports, politics, etc. I studied religion a lot, but I don’t really believe in it. Work and relationships occupy my time. I have talked to a few celebrities though, Jack Blades from Night Ranger, Chuck Liddell MMA. But I didn’t know who they were until after the encounters. Friday, I was told, I talked to an NFL star. I know its stupid, but other than Dak or Zeke from the Cowboys….I don’t know the faces of the jerseys. So, I had no idea who this guy was. I didn’t know Romo’s face until he started being an announcer. It just didn’t interest me. I know Peyton Manning...I see him on commercials when I do rarely watch games. So, I left early Friday morning with the security guard and the secretary to go to the security guard’s Dad’s house to hook up his new TV and sound system. Took us three hours to drive there, an hour for me to mount it to the wall and go through the settings. Her Dad doesn’t eat lunch, so I took the women to one of my favorite restaurants in Frisco. Since I live outside Austin, I rarely get up that way. The food was excellent, and I found it odd that both women were enjoying all my little cultural missteps with her Dad earlier. Her Dad laughed at everything I said. Not the first time I met him, but we both grew up in South Dallas so we had a few things in common but not the way we said them. First, I was never in a gang. Second, I went to a private school. Getting away from my story. We were “socially distanced” from the man sitting at the bar with a woman he came in with. He had on some large gaudy jewelry. I didn’t know him. The security guard did and it was like she became a different person once she recognized him. The woman he was with had her hand on his back and stroked his neck occasionally. Signs I thought she was really into him. During the meal, I got up to go pee. Ugh, once in the restroom, someone was in the toilet stall, and a very old guy was using the urinal. So I waited in this small restroom. The celebrity/athlete came in, stood next to me as we both waited. So he asks me, “Which of those two is your girl?” “Not sure, but that woman you’re with is really into you,” I said in reply. “Gold digger. I’ll fuck her, but cares notin’ bout me. Just who I am. She is so…so…boring. Everything I say she laughs. Just like your girls would.” He said. The old man was taking a very long time…Jesus. “You’re a good looking guy, they probably would. Women do that.” I said. “My girl keeps looking over at your table.” He says. “Well, I do have an obnoxious laugh. Plus, I did poke one in the tit. I plan on slapping the other’s butt when we get back into my car.” I said. “You don’t know me, do you?” he asks. “Not a clue who you are,” I said in a friendly manner. The old man turns around, with his dick still hanging out of his pants, and says, “You’re…You’re…You’re….” while pointing a finger at him. “This is awkward,” I said. “He knows me.” The celebrity said laughing. “Sir, are you finished? I need to pee myself.” I said to the old man. He ignored me. The celebrity is laughing, shaking his head. “Don’t you think I should go first?” He asks me. “I was here first,” I said and tried to ease around the old man. Not much space in this stupid restroom. I didn't feel comfortable touching him with his dick out. The celebrity puts his hand on the old man’s shoulder and pulls him away from the urinal. I cut in. Start my business. “Dawg, put away your junk.” He says to the old man. “Junk? What junk?” the old man says and then starts to ramble. I’m peeing, but in my head, what does he mean by ‘junk’? I keep thinking of that old car axle rotting away in my granny’s pasture, then the odds and ends in a drawer I have at my house and the clutter pile my friend had in his closet as a teen. I finished, zipped up, flushed. Turned. “Man, if you don’t put away your dick I swear I’m gonna pop you.” The celebrity says. “Then there was that time you….” The old man said ignoring what was told to him. I brushed between the two. The old man was barring the celebrity from getting to the urinal and his dick was still hanging out of his pants. Instead of washing my hands, I took the old man by the shoulders and pulled him closer to the sink. “How bout we wash our hands and put away our dicks?” I told the old man. “Dicks? What dicks?” He asks me. I faced him towards the mirror. “That dick! Your dick.” I said. “Oh…Uh…” the old man says and starts putting himself away. The celebrity is laughing, and I wash my hands. The old man follows washing his hands after me, but I dry on a paper towel and leave. After all, I’m done. I go to my table, sit, finish the meal with my friends. The girls watch the celebrity through the window of the restaurant get into his car with the woman he brought. They start to talk about him. “He’s a nice guy,” I said. “He’s a jerk.” Said one. The other nodded her head. “I don’t think so. We talked in the restroom.” I said. “He didn’t talk to us. Ran away to the toilet right after you left when we went over to him. Gave us a disgusted face and said leave him alone.” Said the other. “So, why did you go over to him?” I asked. Neither of them said anything but looked guilty. I asked for the check and the waiter said my lunch had been paid for. “Huh? Who would buy my lunch?” I asked. We were the only people left in the restaurant. He gave the guy’s name which was meaningless to me until I Googled it. Up popped the athlete’s image on my cell that was in the restroom with me. Very weird. Other than my boss, this was the first meal this year anyone has bought for me. I’ve eaten a lot of meals at other people’s houses, but still. I told the women the story of what happened in the restroom on the ride home, embellished a bit since it was a three-hour drive back home. Yet, couldn’t convince them he was a nice guy, plus he bought our lunch. For whatever reason, the women found it hilarious that I didn’t know what junk meant in the context it was being used. I guess he’s rich and famous, at least Google said it was so. I keep thinking of that old guy not letting him pee. I’ve never been so star struck. I think I would be for Richard Feynman, Steve Martin, Ali, or Dennis Ritchie. Steve Martin is still alive I think. Yet, I would I hope I let them pee in peace.
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so....what did you and maynard have to chat about? woop woop
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i have heard he was a helluva nice guy..another story to confirm it....thanx.. woop woop
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