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The world thrusts itself inside  

senfully 55F  
540 posts
8/13/2021 6:41 am
The world thrusts itself inside


I felt pain like an assault,
The old pain again
When the world thrusts itself inside,
when we have take in the outside

—May Sarton, "Night Watch," Collected Poems

The world thrusts itself inside
written June 26th, 2021

The world rages through me
I wrap my arms around
cradling this body amongst the
flowers torn, leaves shredded, plants uprooted

until the fury passes
peace descends on the broken
some breath and start to mend
others their decay feeds the new.

The world thrusts itself
inside each of us
tearing and stretching
throw your head back and rage

with the pain and agony
of growth made possible
by the world tearing open
body, heart, and mind.

I never grow used to this
brutal process,
I dip my fingers into
the holes made in our heart.

The world has its way with us
this relentless thrusting climax
until we spill out over everything
this our mark on the world.

senfully 55F  
443 posts
8/13/2021 6:45 am

I often have an image of a poem in my head, or a feeling of it. The end result is often more analytical than what I had imagined. This one, maybe, is closer to what was in my mind.


Ultraviolet_Sol 43M
622 posts
8/13/2021 11:17 am

I do think this write has a great deal of the primal aspect of the channelled energy in the initial inspiration, the triggering mechanism. For this reason I think that your selection of punctuation fits really well, here.

The opening stanza is just sublime, and carries the activity of a bee hive, into Stanza II, which is equally sublime, contrasting the opening stanza like breath held & breath released. A very cool feeling, as a reader.

I very much like the way Stanza III seems to initiate a feeling of movement, from the flash & pause of the first two stanzas.

Love the transition from Stanza III to Stanza IV. The continuity has a cool rhythm.

And then how you introduce yourself into the poem, in Stanza V.

Providing meaning & context in Stanza VI, which feels perfectly placed.

I can certainly see why you were pleased with this write.

Very cool & awesome.

*. *. *


kamaruhl3 63M
4985 posts
8/13/2021 11:50 am

such strong images. thank you sen


69ereatwetpussy 61M
6774 posts
8/15/2021 4:24 am

You are a tornado
You start off small
As you travel around
You gain strength
You now are strong
Racing along
Nothing can stand in you way
You leave a path
Shows where you been
You tire out
From with in
And gone with the wind


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