My Blog
 
Welcome to my blog!
Keywords | Title View | Refer to a Friend |
Don't give up
Posted:Jan 27, 2022 5:23 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
550 Views

Sometimes age and health run into slowdowns or take a vacation from sex and feeling frisky. That's hit me after getting mild case of covid and devoting a lot of time caregiving my poor spouse. Love correspondencing with FriendFinder-x friends here and watch naked people enjoying each other. So I haven't given up on sexual vitality. Expecting things will get better and doing my best to see that that happens.

But realistically, it is easy. As I look back it was only less difficult. lol Maybe you too hit a slump from time to time. Seems pretty natural to me. Let's not give up.
0 Comments
Happy Holidays Everyone
Posted:Dec 12, 2021 5:58 am
Last Updated:Dec 22, 2021 5:27 am
680 Views

Besides protecting yourself from stds and covid, this is a time to celebrate life and everything good about it. That includes intimacy, affection, special relationships, family of course, and sex. I love it all. Most of it is a tingling and hope of mingling. Solo or not, it's hot. Our bodies need as much exercise as our minds. We can taste and smell good too. What a great way to share some happy moments with special others.
0 Comments
What makes you happy
Posted:Nov 27, 2021 5:42 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
744 Views

Well lots of things make happy? On FriendFinder-x I admit I love oral pleasuring so much: the scent and taste of men and women are thrilling to me. I love the sounds of giving pleasure. Photos and vids are exciting as well. For a couple years now I've really enjoyed corresponding on FriendFinder-x. I suppose what makes me most happy is the quality of conversation, interaction with friends and friends to be on here.

Being on here has opened me to a great variety of ways to be happy sexually. Just discovering the potential for great rimming. The body is just as amazing as the mind, multi functional. What makes you happy?
1 comment
Ability and disability
Posted:Oct 29, 2021 1:52 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
842 Views

It's probably not cool to admit I have a hereditary disability that affects my gait and balance. But in the last two years it has progressed where I use a cane and a rollator--walker with wheels. I use an elliptical, walk around the neighborhood, do chair yoga and eat a healthy diet. And care for ailing spouse. She's always known of my sexual fluidity. We are a loving couple, though our views and activities about sex are no longer the same.

Why mention this? Because I am not two-dimensional, but a whole person with loving family ( and grands), rich in diversity, vitality and acceptance of the vast variety of people. Yes, I have a philosophical bend of mind, progressive, curious and sexy. My disability does not eliminate my abilities.

Perhaps you have some kind of disability--maybe it's still invisible to everyone but not to you. Emotional? Mental? Physical? Loneliness? I'm glad to be part of the FriendFinder-x "community". We are able to recognize our sexual, relational needs--to be satisfied with others AND to satisfy others. Some of us may be exclusive but I suspect most of us are not. We are still able to connect, to be friendly. We are probably selective in what we do, but not necessarily in what we want to do.

Years ago I liked a saying: "Don't get so hung up on your hang up that you can't do your thing!" Yeah, well, disabilities can hang us up. But we still have abilities to use, to explore, to share, to be adult friends for each other. Yay us!
0 Comments
To all who communicate compassion
Posted:Sep 6, 2021 5:42 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
1205 Views

What keeps me cumming back to FriendFinder-x is the number of men and women who write to me, who care about pleasure but understand it's often not a straight line (heh heh). US culture seems to have trouble accepting our "pleasure principle". It's like the media and ordinary discourse (I was going to write "intercourse" but just another double entendre) want to clothe everything, hide the truth, pretend that what's really there is not there. I don't get it.

But so many of us here realize the complexities and work our way through or around them to achieve some pleasure (some more than others). I also notice that age and looks are not everything. Spirit. Mutuality. Wellbeing. These are the underlying motivations for the relationships I treasure on here. That said I want to do my best to stay healthy, look good, practice what I uh um "preach".

We are vulnerable, some of us are somewhat fragile. I know I am, as age etches its art on my body (and mind). Still, it's great that so many of us remain curious and fascinated about our sexplorations, however limited or copious they may be. I love those with hot candles who nevertheless show compassion under difficult circumstances. You know who you are. Hats off to you (along with other items)! Cheers everyone!
0 Comments
Pleasure is not pushy
Posted:Aug 14, 2021 3:35 am
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2021 12:40 pm
2286 Views

Just thinking about pleasure and wondering why our (US) culture seems more intent on competition and winning than on the benefits of sane pleasuring. Also, it seems that there is far more toleration for violence than for affection or pleasure or satisfaction. Why is that? It is fashionable to abhor violence and to think that it will never happen to me and mine. But the newspapers and news media tell a different story. Violence dominates the news cycle, or else competition (which team wins, is better than others, matters more, sells more).

The thing about pleasure, as I see it anyway, is that it doesn't thrive on being pushy. Pleasure takes time, reduces tension in the long run, prepares us to feel better about ourselves and about others.

I'm tempted to say "Pleasure isn't pushy. It's pussy!" But that's just too clever a word . It is of course true how pleasurable pussy is but really just want it to be mutually enjoyed or solo or at least uncoerced--in other words not pushy. It may be fun to role play "pushy pussy" but only if those involved agree.

My point is that pleasure is so important to well being in contrast to the fear and anxiety that comes from unwanted pushiness, coercion, competition, impatience. There's plenty to enjoy if we allow it to happen. Can't make it happen without damaging something vital in us. Yeah, I'm a grandpa but not a grump pa. Just want more loving around.
3 Comments
Adult friends in a time of infection
Posted:Jul 10, 2021 3:45 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
1476 Views

FriendFinder-x offered some title choices. This one seemed so relevant to the last 16 months or more. Sexplorations risk infections as everyone knows. With a pandemic you don't even need sex to risk infection. And with more than 600K dead from this COVID-19 virus and the new Delta Variant creating another surge, the threat of infection is very serious indeed.

Infections are not the only barriers for adult friends. How about disabilities? Mine is a neuromuscular hereditary condition that affects gait and balance. Runs in the family. Progressive too. Yet it does not limit or inhibit my sexual desires but it has added to my hesitancy in getting out there.

Then there's the barriers of ageism, looksism. And fears and anxieties that cripple our openness, honesty, and joy of living. Infections are not the only barrier to finding and developing adult (sexual, sensual, spiritual) friendships.

So ours is a time of great fear and all too often the hostility that goes with it. But let's not let the reality of infection wipe out the possibilities for affection. We crave touch and sex. I do. But this is a time to use the mind to find the kind of affection we need to express. Mutual masturbation? Cam or IM fun? Corresponding? Yeah, and more possibilities.

Sharing is caring. Infections are real. Affections are the best gifts life has to offer. So I think it's worth repeating: Let's not let our fears of infection kill our capacity for affection. Let's be friends.
1 comment
Ageless
Posted:May 23, 2021 5:13 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
1604 Views

Tomorrow I turn 77. Such a measurement is like being in a taxi and watching mileage equate to cab fare. OMG. So arbitrary. Don't know about you but I fight against ageism, looksism, orientationism. ISMs aren't bosoms. Give me bosoms any day. Spare me -ISMs. Sure we want to look good but mostly we want to respond to the spirit in you that is attracted to the spirit in me.

Call it chemistry, compatibility. It's mutuality. Sometimes mutuality is instant but often it is cultivated like trust, caring, sharing and friendship. FriendFinder-x Yup, this site is about FRIENDS. And although we may crave this or that, what matters most is the back and forth, give and take, to please and be pleasured, safety and mutuality of the relationship. Consent is the constant. Happiness the outcum. No meter. No measure. The goal is pleasure. That's enough treasure.
0 Comments
Mutual happiness
Posted:Apr 24, 2021 4:42 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
1970 Views

I took a short break because I felt overwhelmed. My spouse and I love each other, now in a nonsexual way due to differences in attitudes and health concerns. She's sexclusive and I am not. This has always been the case. How you wonder could this ever end in marriage? Well, it did and is great in so many ways. I'm FriendFinder-x she knows. it's not that she likes it but that she's knows it's an aspect of who I am. I think my life lesson is that we don't always get what we expect or want in just the way/s we expect or want. We can boohoo about it or cope and adapt.

So I am trying find mutual happiness with others whose situations may be similar. Sex is a touchy subject, eh? Literally. We are not robots programmed like machines. We are really complex organisms with a capacity for mutuality.

I love the curiosity and energy and beauty of younger AFFers--w, m and t. I also like the compassion and wisdom and spirit of older AFFers, too. Life is not a blueprint but a river, a stream of vitality. I want to go and cum with the flow in mutual confluence. How about you? Happiness is possible.
1 comment
Stop the World. I want to get off!
Posted:Apr 7, 2021 3:23 am
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2021 5:45 am
2065 Views

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed as spring advances. Returning to past routines or changing them. I've enjoyed corresponding here and have met great people on FriendFinder-x. Not sure what's up ahead--are any of us that sure? I hope and plan and prepare for it being good. Best wishes to all. Hope to resume another day. Pleasure can be safe, sane, consensual and ever so healthy!
1 comment
Emerging into a new day more slowly
Posted:Mar 29, 2021 3:11 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
2155 Views

What a year when fantasy took control of reality--at least sexually for . Solo fun but with lots of correspondence and IM chats. You AFFers are great share greetings and chats and imaginations. Many of you are lucky have partners who love and look for some "more" spice things . Others I talk are like , lonely with partners we love but for whom sex just isn't "on the menu".

What do you think? Do we expect too much of sex? Do we load it with performance anxiety--am I good enough? Do I want my partner be someone this partner just isn't going be?

I think I've come accept that I'm bi, really love my wife, really enjoy flirting. I'd be adventuresome again but this time without being so impulsive. I want some chemistry, some sense of connection without insistent expectations. I can take care of "nature". It still feels wonderful.

Really looking emerge into something more than wham bam and less than strings attached. Covid 19 isn't the only terror going around. But I don't want fear to crush the life out of me. Life is risky. Sanity is possible. Let's and see where it goes? Life is still great.
0 Comments
Sexclusivity vs Sex Inclusivity
Posted:Feb 26, 2021 7:13 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2022 7:6 pm
2294 Views

Hmmm. Not sure that I was ever wired for sex exclusivity. Not that anything goes. I'm probably demisexual: has be chemistry, mutuality, respect for real sex as far as I'm concerned. I'm married. I'm bi. I'm happy. I don't much go for orientation labels: never felt included. Queer here but not necessarily like I've read about.

I love please and enjoy being pleased. Sex is fun and doable and renewable and much easier than being grumpy. I can still feel like 26. I hope you all are finding satisfactions, caring for others as part of your own happiness, I'd love hear from you. Love corresponding these days: my pen is ... is, well, full of ink, virtually. LOL Drop a line or chat on IM if you'd like. Stay safe. Be well.
0 Comments
More than sex less than drama
Posted:Jan 7, 2021 3:26 am
Last Updated:Jan 8, 2021 2:00 am
2548 Views
Relationships are rich in complexity, especially when sex is involved. After all, sharing microbes is as physically intimate as you can get. I'm no longer at an age where lust is a must. It's a maybe. Gotta have chemistry--something more than a wham bam. Sense of humor. Curiosity. Intelligence. Not too intense. Not too passive. And not into possession, jealousy, demands, commitments that just are not going to be real.

So I look for more than sex but less than drama. I am happily married, though I miss the sexual dimension. So I guess you might say I'm desi sexual--particular about partners. Sex is complex--mixing microbes is risky. Fascinating but not so simple for me, now.

Can talk about anything but looking for something more than sex and at the same time less than drama. Need to trust in a safe, sane, mutually consensual time for fun.
0 Comments

To link to this blog (Ianpoman) use [blog Ianpoman] in your messages.

 Ianpoman 77M
77 M
January 2022
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
            1
 
2
 
3
 
4
 
5
 
6
 
7
 
8
 
9
 
10
 
11
 
12
 
13
 
14
 
15
 
16
 
17
 
18
 
19
 
20
 
21
 
22
 
23
 
24
 
25
 
26
 
27
1
28
 
29
 
30
 
31
 
         

Recent Visitors

Visitor Age Sex Date
Fla2Ny  72M2/14
Brigham2013 78M1/27
shelostinterest62M1/21
Leegs2012 49M12/25
joe2712018 67M12/24
jenfun6918F12/21
allen5559  62M12/21
2biday  63M12/13
WineNDineWithMe 55M11/23
RaduAlex79  78M11/18