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Random Thoughts 3: The Good, The Bad and The Horny
Posted:Sep 26, 2021 12:58 pm
Last Updated:Oct 13, 2021 5:32 am

What's going through my head today?

* My vacation has officially started. And my roommate has been out of town for a couple of days so I've had the opportunity to just be naked and high for a couple of days. Having fun!!!

* I have seriously been super horny the last few days.

* I love to suck and nibble on nipples, male or female, as long as they are hairless

* I'm super happy this new medication seems to be working so well. I've actually been able to have a couple of online conversations without being super anxious.

* I want to visit a glory hole. I want to have my cock sucked there. I want to suck cock there. I want to make another guy cum and cum all over him. Even better, a group of guys just stroking, sucking, and cumming all over each other.

* Have I mentioned I've been super horny lately?

* Going to visit a local-ish casino this week and spend the night. Maybe I'll meet someone to play with while I'm there.

Fuck, I can't stop stroking my cock. I better go take care of it
Random Thoughts 2: Electric Boogaloo
Posted:Sep 16, 2021 2:46 pm
Last Updated:Sep 16, 2021 6:09 pm

Some more things running through my mind...

* It's the start of my "weekend" and exactly 2 weeks away from the first day of vacation. I think I might spend a day or two at the casino. A good challenge for me since there will be tons of opportunities to interact with strangers. That's a difficult thing for me. I can't initiate conversations, so how the hell can I hope to get laid again? lol

* I'm on a higher dosage of my medication now and it seems to be working well. That gives me hope as it's gotten easier to talk to co-workers that I don't know well. It's also gotten easier for me to respond to messages I get on here. At least, the ones I CAN respond to. Maybe I'll finally upgrade so I can respond to the rest.

* Booze and weed are great social lubricants for me but I refuse to drive high or drunk, so I don't know how helpful that might be in interacting with others. Maybe I can put it to the test soon since I'll have a room at the casino hotel.

* I want to fuck naked outside. I want to watch and jerk off to a couple fucking in front of me. I want to be part of both a bi MFM threesome and a bi FMF threesome. I want to be involved in an orgy.

* I've only kissed one guy but did not enjoy it. I've never been attracted to men, but I fucking love sucking cock.

Okay, that's all now. I'm high and horny and need to cum.
Random thoughts
Posted:Sep 12, 2021 11:01 am
Last Updated:Oct 19, 2021 10:18 am

I'm normally at work right now so I think I'll jot down a few thoughts...

* As uncomfortable with face-to-face communication as I am, I feel like I'm remarkably comfortable getting naked with someone else. Last time I was playing with someone else (many moons ago unfortunatly) I felt no anxiety getting naked. Maybe it was because he had his cock out already, but who knows.

* I'm 2 weeks away from vacation and I have no idea what to do. I'm open for suggestions

* I've been to numerous strip clubs, but have never gotten a lap dance.

* I feel bad that I can't reply to some people on here yet. I need to upgrade. I guess I'm still nervous about interacting with others. Even online is a challenge for me. I overthink everything I am going to say ( and type. I've been writing this for almost 2 hours ).

* I wonder if some of the items on my sexual bucket list would be considered pretty vanilla to most people.

OKay. 5 is enough for now. I'm giving myself a headache. But, in a good way, I think.
How should I do this
Posted:Sep 11, 2021 4:10 am
Last Updated:Sep 14, 2021 9:44 pm

Ok. I think I'm high enough do this. It's frakkin' early in the morning but I'm not sleepy yet. I think I'm just going do this kinda as it pops in my head. That way I'm not overthinking things. I do that a lot.

I gave myself a challenge today. How many people at the store were wearing glasses. It was to force myself to look up from the ground and look in front of me. I was halfway through the shopping before I remembered. So I started then and discovered that I could not do it. I could not look at strangers' faces. Which I thought was weird because I can make eye contact when I'm talking to someone face to face. I think I'll try to practice that at work. It's hard when you're used to looking down all the time.

This is a weird place for me to be writing this, but part of this is to let myself be as real as possible. Even though online is easier than face-to-face, it's still hard for me to talk to people. And I feel like this gives me. the freedom and anonymity to be able to be open and learn more about me and creating friendships and -ships.

I discovered FriendFinder-x's IM and it pretty much blows. I can't respond pretty much anyone so far. At least with the messages, I can respond a few.

Ugh, it's later than I want it be. There's more I want write. I hope I remember tomorrow haha

Fuck, I'm horny. A favorite side effect of being high haha

If you'll excuse me, I'm going to jerk off and blow a well-deserved load
More about me
Posted:Sep 9, 2021 2:55 pm
Last Updated:Oct 19, 2021 10:18 am

== Results from bdsmtest.org ==
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What is this for?
Posted:Sep 9, 2021 2:08 pm
Last Updated:Sep 20, 2021 6:00 pm

I'm going to try this as another way to work on me as well as a way to let others know about me. I have no idea what I'll talk about, but I think this journey of discovery should be documented in some way. Through therapy and medication, I hope to see changes in me. Since I can't expect to see them on a daily basis, I think this will be a good way to document the changes, good or bad.

To link to this blog (MatthiasBernael) use [blog MatthiasBernael] in your messages.

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What is this for? (4)Leegs2012
Sep 20, 2021 11:00 am