Why bother resisting what you know you want
|
Posted:Feb 29, 2020 1:46 pm
Last Updated:Mar 21, 2020 2:45 pm
24744 Views
|
I absolutely did not want to sleep with him.
We were practically strangers
The timing was wrong
I was willing to communicate with him
But I wasn’t ready to go home with him
But he coaxed and cajoled and called to me with this primal yell
that said “get over here before I come and drag you”
So I went to him
Allowing him to touch and tease and kiss and stroke and fondle
until he took me to the point of no return
It was only then that he disrobed
When I was beyond all resistance
When I no longer had the desire to be reasonable
Then I could feel his hardness pressing into my thigh
I could feel the pre-cum
On my hand when I touched him
He resumed touching me but made no move to go further
Impressing upon me that I did really want him
That I had been wrong to try to resist him
Finally, he hovered over me.
His cock resting just beyond my now eager pussy
I tried to maneuver him
But he resisted me until I was all but begging him to take me
Finally he filled me
Sliding into my wetness
Claiming me for his own
Taking what he needed but giving too
The night wore on and ended with repeat performances
My only regret was in not going to him sooner
|
|
|
7
Comments
|
|
I had my doubts
|
Posted:Feb 28, 2020 5:38 pm
Last Updated:Apr 11, 2020 4:11 pm
22699 Views
|
Not every detail needs to be written. It’s not important to know that he grabbed me the hand, led me to the mirror, and stood close behind me with his arms wrapped around me as he pointed out all the things he thought were beautiful about me. It’s not important to tell you that we stood there until I was willing to accept there was beauty to be seen. But these things set the tone the evening. I told him I deserved a back rub having to put up with such torture, and I kicked off shoes, took off shirt, laid down on the bed and was as comfortable with him as someone I’ve known for a lifetime, though we didn’t know each other at all. The details of the sex weren’t important, either. I’m not going to explain who put what where and how it tasted or felt though I will say it was pretty damn good.
But what was important is that someone found me desirable even though I believed it would never happen again. It’s important to know that nipples are fun to play with and body is worthy of attention and pussy still stays sopping wet and that a man didn’t just want to fuck me and leave but fucked me once, twice, and a third time, though I didn’t think I had the power to entice anyone even once anymore. And it’s absolutely important to know that I am capable of being exposed and naked and fondled and kissed and stroked and pleased and pleasing because I thought those days had come and gone, but maybe they’re just getting started. And maybe as I delve deeper into own hidden desires the stories will become worthy of being written.
|
|
|
9
Comments
|
|
At Home That Night
|
Posted:Feb 23, 2020 8:15 pm
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2024 9:53 pm
15380 Views
|
I have flashbacks of that night. Some of the moments were breathtaking and some were awkward. I knew early on I wanted to touch you. I remembered asking if I could help you rub the soreness of your neck and shoulder. You obliged, and there were those minutes where I sat behind you, longing to place my hands on your bare skin but satisfied enough to touch you through your shirt. It was a ploy to get you to touch me back...would it work? Time would tell. So much yet so little happened in the space of an hour. I smile at the reminder of seeing you turn your perfect little ass from me as you grabbed your rope. From my vantage point on my knees, I was at eye level. You sure know how to fill your jeans. But my favorite part, the one that makes my heart melt, is the remembrance of how I was kneeling before you as you sat back in your seat. My hands were resting on your thighs. Even through the thick material, I could feel your strength and your heat. And you didn’t stop me. You didn’t tell me I couldn’t touch you. You didn’t tell me my hands belonged at my sides or behind my back. For as long as I kneeled there, my hands were touching you. And they’ve never felt more at home.
It’s those things, those moments with you that I long to recreate and replicate. I long to see you again. More than I expected. I want to pursue all my fantasies and longings. I want you to allow me to put my hands all over your body. I want to feel that sense of belonging and of being at home with you.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
The New Car Challenge
|
Posted:Feb 20, 2020 7:39 am
Last Updated:Feb 21, 2020 3:39 am
13831 Views
|
I bought a car last week as many of you know. In the midst of negotiations and deciding what I wanted, I also chatted with someone, who knew where I was and took great delight in making me blush and giggle (yes, I still giggle like a little girl; it’s adorable). I am not a blusher, though, so my hat’s off to him for his skill. One of the things he said to me was that I should celebrate my new car by taking pics for him...maybe one with the girls free and atop the steering wheel. Really? Me? Do that? Have you not noticed there are no nudes of me anywhere?
I did make a fully clothed video for him of me talking about the fact that I could not make it work logistically and what I could do as a substitute. While he thought the video was cute, it was not what he wanted, so he sent me back to try again. He gave me pointers on how to make it work. With this ever increasing desire to please him, I put on my best red lipstick, took off my shirt, and went to my car. I pushed the seat back, climbed in, started recording, and knelt in the front seat as he suggested. I could not make it work still, though I now know for certain the horn works. What ensued was a recording of me playing with my wayward tits, stimulating my nipples, and laughing at the ridiculousness of the the situation, as I tried to make my large breasts cooperate in a compact car. I was all the more pleased with myself because in spite of my failure, I knew I would amuse him and cause him to smile.
I thought I would delete the video as soon as I sent it to him. I’ve since decided to keep it. I could do without the images, but the sound of my voice and my own amusement are captured in a minute of carefree woman- delight, which cannot occur often enough.
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
If I Had The Words
|
Posted:Feb 18, 2020 11:02 am
Last Updated:Feb 19, 2020 2:28 am
13238 Views
|
If I had the words I would tell you
How you somehow captured my imagination on that very first day
How it didn’t even take meeting you to know I was bound for trouble
If I had the words I’d tell you that I think about you daily
I wonder if you are somewhere safe
If you’re happy
If you’re giving your attentions to someone else
And if you ever think about me
If I had the words I would ask you to come back
To hurry
To not linger any longer on adventures in the world
But to instead embark on a new one with me
If I had the words I’d tell you that I long to explore with you
To kiss your lips
To taste your body
To listen to you breathe
To feel your hands touching me
To have you fill me with your own need
If I had the words I would tell you that I know it makes no sense
But I need you in my life
But I don’t have the words
All I have is the feeling
The ever growing feeling
That I may never see you again
That I am destined to feel this ache inside me
That began the moment you first spoke to me
And doesn’t seem to dissipate with time or distance or silence from you.
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Different Paths and New Things
|
Posted:Feb 17, 2020 5:17 am
Last Updated:Feb 17, 2020 6:42 pm
13007 Views
|
I bought a new car yesterday. I went to the dealership with specific ideas in mind, yet I wound up with something I hadn’t planned on buying. The biggest departure is the color. I absolutely wanted a blue car. I always want blue. Everything I have is blue. Blue eyes, blue glasses, lots of blue clothing, a blue head, and my car I left behind was blue. This car is gray...there are hints of blue, but it’s gray. However, I walked on my back porch to look down at my car this morning and smiled. It’s not what I expected, but it’s absolutely beautiful just the .
I think the biggest thing I’m dealing with in the afterglow/buyer’s remorse mixture at the moment is that I let someone lead me in a direction, and I followed. I was given key information that was designed to turn me on, and I think I forgot all the things I thought I wanted. What does that say about me? It’s an internal struggle I’m having. I want to be in control of everything, but I want to experience things that take away my control. I want to satisfy my own immediate needs and wants and have always been stubbornly resistant to anyone else’s input about what would be good for me, even if I would benefit from this information. Yet, suddenly I’m finding myself wanting to allow myself the luxury and pleasure of letting someone else be in control to satisfy me even if his methods would have never been my own.
So, today I have a new car. It’s not blue, but it’s beautiful just the , and I have a world of experience ahead of me that might not be what I expected, but it will be beautiful just the .
|
|
|
4
Comments
|
|
This could take a while. ;)
|
Posted:Feb 12, 2020 7:16 pm
Last Updated:Feb 28, 2020 3:17 am
12937 Views
|
I want you to come here
and teach me everything you know.
Your mind is brilliant and exciting
Your thoughts are rare
I’m honored to be in your presence
But be certain I am listening and learning
My mind wanders to your beauty
When I should be focused on your knowledge instead
Quiz me for understanding
Test me for comprehension
Challenge me for depth
I want to be with you where you are
to have my limits stretched
My boundaries expanded
I want to learn everything you have to offer
Be patient with me as I grow
As I struggle to be the best I can be
Your capacity seems limitless
Share with me your knowledge
Help me to be a better me
Teach me everything you know
|
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
Trying to figure me out
|
Posted:Feb 12, 2020 4:10 am
Last Updated:Feb 12, 2020 7:22 pm
11747 Views
|
I have said it in passing in my typical flippant manner, but maybe it’s the truth... I want someone to dominate me so I don’t have to control anything. I just want to be there experiencing but not forcing for a change. In my daily world, I make every decision for everyone. My brain is tired. Beyond tired. Maybe for once I don’t want to have to tell anyone what should happen or how to please me. I want someone to watch me and study me and figure it out and then pick me up, carry me to the safest place he knows and then tease me, torture me with my own desires, and take me at his leisure. I am a conundrum to myself. I don’t want to submit. I want to be dominated into submission to where even the decision to submit has been made for me. I want to love it for how much I hate it. I want to find excitement and sheer pleasure in how unnerved it makes me. I want to squirm and yearn and quiver in my delight but also in my lack of control.
This I promise, though. It isn’t going to be easy for all my acquiescence. I will be a brat. I will tell you to go fuck yourself somehow, someway. I will make you want to kill me even as your heart reaches out to me and you can’t take your eyes from my pretty face.
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Always the fat lady, never the bride
|
Posted:Feb 11, 2020 5:45 am
Last Updated:Mar 7, 2020 4:13 pm
11518 Views
|
So I’m going to be honest right here and say that while I have the desire to get my eating disorder recovery back on track, I haven’t had the motivation or the energy. It is difficult to be as hyper vigilant as I need to be about my recovery process and still manage to work, laugh, play, and breathe.
However, there are two things occurring simultaneously that have helped to ignite my inner motivational fire. The first is that I can’t seem to get fucked for anything these days. The second is that my and her boyfriend are looking at engagement rings. I cannot be the fat mother of the bride. I refuse to be the fat mother of the bride. The day will of course be all about her. I have no desire to steal the show or upstage her, but if I have to be present for all of the preparation and the parties and the joy and the laughter, then I also don’t want to do anything to shame or humiliate either her or myself throughout the entire process. She is my best friend, and I am super proud of her and want her to be proud of me, too. Besides, I have every intention of staying sober and still managing to take home one of the groomsman.
|
|
|
4
Comments
|
|
The Highs and Lows
|
Posted:Feb 10, 2020 8:12 am
Last Updated:Feb 10, 2020 7:23 pm
11839 Views
|
The internet allows you to get close to people you might not have otherwise met. Windows of correspondence come from every corner of the world. Through these tiny windows, people enter your living rooms and bedrooms. They share your laughter, your tears, your bed. They become a part of who you are, leading you in directions you would have never expected to take. They become a part of your journey, taking on meaningful roles in your life. Sometimes they become the fabric of your entire being. But other times, they disappear. Even though their role is not complete you, they’ve satisfied whatever longing existed in them. They are ready move to on, and often do so without a proper goodbye. These moments become the highs and lows of an otherwise static existence. Sometimes l wish I never found you. You led me to the lowest of the lows. Yet, I know in heart it is because you first took me to the highest of the highs. And that, I can only truly be grateful and nothing more.
Altered
The internet allows you to get close to people you might not have otherwise met. Windows of correspondence come from every corner of the world. People enter your living rooms and bedrooms through these tiny windows with bewildering deftness. They share your laughter, your tears, your bed. They become a part of who you are, leading you in directions you would have never expected to take. They become a part of your journey, taking on meaningful roles in your life. Sometimes they become the fabric of your entire being. But other times, they disappear with almost the same deftness but the ache and the longing they leave behind. Even though their role is not complete for you, they’ve satisfied whatever longing existed in them. They are ready to move on, and often do so without a proper goodbye. These moments become the highs and lows of an otherwise static existence. Sometimes l wish I never found you. You led me to the lowest of the lows. Yet, I know in my heart it is because you first took me to the highest of the highs. For that, I can only truly be grateful and nothing more.
|
|
|
6
Comments
|
|
Empty packages
|
Posted:Feb 7, 2020 9:19 pm
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2020 3:03 pm
10726 Views
|
*Disclaimer* it’s not the being married that hurts so much. Everyone needs affection sometimes,. No, it’s that they lie about it and make fools of everyone involved.
It's not fair
Not fair at all
When these married men hit on me
When they want to take what they can from me
Never able to offer their best in return
they never understand
That though they're convinced
Their penis alone makes them God's gift to the world
It's a gift wrapped box
Filled with nothing
There's no comfort
No companionship
No safe harbor
There's no friendship
No meaning
No purpose
All of that belongs to another
Like the contents of a box
A box that has been emptied, gift wrapped, handed over
to a woman
who would rather have the contents
Than a pretty package
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Longing
|
Posted:Feb 7, 2020 11:35 am
Last Updated:Feb 20, 2020 7:18 pm
10809 Views
|
Ask about my day
I yearn to kneel before you as you listen to me speak
As you get to know me
As you watch me with eyes of intensity
Talk to me
Hear what I have to say
I’m starved for your attention
Feed my soul with your questions
Replenish my body with your responses
I crave your touch
But even more than that,
I ache to feel your mind connected to mine
I long for you to draw nearer to my soul
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Stroking
|
Posted:Feb 4, 2020 3:56 pm
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2020 5:56 pm
10913 Views
|
My friend sent me a video of himself stroking. Normally I’m not a fan. I want it in the room with me, not hundreds or thousands of miles away. And stroking seems like such a waste anyway. We don’t need your hand on your cock. It’s mine! Mine to play with. Mine to arouse. Mine to fuck. Mine to get off on. I’m a greedy one. But this video was sexy as hell. I’ve watched it a dozen times so far with a delighted smile on my face. But it’s not so much him stroking that appeals to me. I mean, that’s sexy, too, seeing his hand wrapped around that fat cock, glistening with warming oil. But it’s more than that. I see him going from recording his play to his face as he looks into the phone screen, calls me by name, and tells me that if he doesn’t make it to see me, I’m going to have to come to him. Like I said, it’s mine. He knows it. I know it. We both know that one day soon his fat cock is going to make its way to my tight little pussy, and I’m going to ride it like I’ve been straddling him my entire life.
|
|
|
4
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (gymrat1974) use [blog gymrat1974] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
| |
|
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
101
|
111
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
|
|
Most Recent Comments by Others
| Liars and Lovers and Friends (7) | MustaschRide99
Sep 12, 2021 5:00 pm |
| Shattered Glass And Other Signs Of Affection (4) | boobwhisperer69
Aug 22, 2021 7:41 pm |
| MIA (5) | golfer980
Mar 28, 2021 2:39 pm |
| Something in the way he smiles at me (7) | Paulxx001
Mar 28, 2021 1:57 pm |
| Something More Than A Good Time (3) | Paulxx001
Oct 17, 2020 6:57 pm |
| Joyful, Joyful, Joyful (3) | pocogato12
Sep 26, 2020 4:26 am |
| Everything Is Sexier With You (4) | igotplentytogive
Sep 25, 2020 1:40 am |
| Contemplations (6) | Paulxx001
Sep 22, 2020 10:48 am |
| Red Cheeks For You (7) | danielraymazeii1
Sep 21, 2020 2:21 am |
| Always Wanting More (5) | ImInterested904
Sep 20, 2020 6:07 am |
| Lost (2) | JakeStatez
Sep 11, 2020 4:06 pm |
|
