ONE MAN'S JOURNEY - Part 4  

jacker_wild 87M  
29 posts
6/10/2021 9:25 pm
ONE MAN'S JOURNEY - Part 4


SORRY..... WORDS KEEP DISAPPEARING FROM MY POSTS. I EDIT AND PUT THEM BACK AND NEXT DAY THEY OR DIFFERENT WORDS DISAPPEAR....

When my friend and I woke at noon that day ............I really felt awkward. We had gone from good friends to lovers, overnight. Unlike the night before, there was no "hanky-panky" that Saturday morning, but just a hushed silence, broken by the sounds of our breathing. If anything at all was to be said.......... this was the moment.

Neither one of us made any attempt to get out of bed, and any sane person would have thought that we were about to have another round............... Instead, we looked at one another awkwardly and as if on cue, both burst into laughter. We wrapped our arms around each other's naked body, and planted a nice kiss on the other's shoulder. Time to get up!

It was time for me get dressed and go home...........I had nothing planned for the day, except some painting of the trim on my house. He offered to help if I wanted him to. .

During these last couple of posts, I didn't mention my wife, because she was totally oblivious to what had gone on between him and myself..........knowing him as just a good friend. She had always trusted me implicitly, and there was no way in hell I could ever run the risk of losing her by being "honest" and talking over what had happened between " good friends". That would have been marital suicide on a couple of levels. She was definitely not a "woman of the world" and I knew her that well to know she would have thrown a fit, grabbed the and left. On the second level, she had brothers............. very big, macho brothers,............ who would have helped move me out of my own house................if was anything left of me after they had finished. No shit!!!...........I was really concerned about both of those.

So we just resumed life on a "normal" scale and pushed the whole thing behind us............. at least by outward appearances. Secretly, I thought about him all the time....... wondering when we could get together again. It happened once more.........kind of awkwardly, and almost as a "duty fuck "...............and I knew this had strained our relationship. He didn't stop by as often, didn't respond to my messages left in his voicemail............... and when we chatted on the phone he said he had "been busy".

We set up a dinner date for one night after work..., just the two of us, and were to meet outside the restaurant we had made reservations at. I stood outside for about 20 minutes, figuring I was about to be stood up, when I see him coming down the street. On his arm was the biggest "flamer" I had ever seen.............. complete with bleached blond hair and eye make-up. I was speechless when he introduced "blondie" as his "boyfriend"............... and callously told me to go home to my wife. I really don't know how I got home that night. Devastated is not the right word................. destroyed would be more appropriate. We went from friends, to lovers, to enemies in one felt swoop.

They say that you always remember the "first time".......... well, I read just a bit more than "sex" into what had happened between us. He obviously hadn't, and to be so cruel and uncaring in the way he broke off our relationship............ that included friendship and lovers.............. was just a bit more that I could handle.

Of course my wife questioned why he hadn't been around in a couple of weeks. I gave the usual lame excuses, but inside I was being torn apart. I thought about him every minute of every day. Turning the entire incident over and over in my mind until i wanted to throw up. Doesn't sound very macho, does it????................. I agree, and if I could have kicked myself in the ass, I would have. But there was nobody I could confide in, nobody I could talk to , about how devastated I really was.

Well............... I kept it bottled up, until my family started telling me that I should go the doctor, because I "didn't look well". No fucking wonder!!!!.............I lost 30 pounds in 6 weeks. I couldn't stomach food. I had bags the size of steamer trunks under my eyes, because I couldn't sleep nights. I was edgy, irritable, and downright nasty to everyone around , including my wife, who certainly didn't deserve any of this ..... She was the one with the most concern for my health, and I was verbally beating up on her. I hated myself for ever allowing something so pleasurable and yet so forbidden, to occur.................. but that's a story for another day....................................

HGMDale 68M  
82 posts
6/21/2021 9:37 pm

Well damn man that really sucks


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