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| Blogs > rm_SadeDeGrey > An Undiscovered Me |
How do you use your sex toys (with yourself and others)? How often?
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How do you use your sex toys (with yourself and others)? How often? An instruction manual to the sex toys that I own; okay I’ll admit I read everything there is to know about the Fleshlight before I actually used one. Honestly it wasn’t my most graceful moment, two Fleshlight sleeves, not enough lube, and all of this while trying to use the VStroker *sigh*. Other than being perhaps one of the best orgasms I’ve had (to that point) until I learned how to use it properly, it was very awkward but in retrospect I suppose my actual first time with a real girl will be even more so. Nowadays when I use my Fleshlight, for the most part it’s training, stamina, learning what I like, and making it more of an experience than just getting turned on suddenly and needing a release. Not that I don’t cum just for fun but that somewhat makes me feel guilty… not that I’m one of those religious types but while the body is in bliss, my heart is still empty so again I try only to think of it as a training exercise for something that may never cum, a girl I mean My video camera is quite the turn on; I've said this before, exhibitionism, voyeurism, truly get me going, it's only when I decide to notice that I feel incredibly... weirded out. They say that a picture is worth a thousand words; while I have spent my life trying to capture the beauty of young women I will concede defeat to perhaps her look of ecstasy caught on camera. I've filmed myself on camera and have imagined what others may think of me, if I answer for myself I actually have been turned on with my own look which is truly not the day to day. It also helps to have an unbiased witness, the mind plays tricks but if I can watch myself and a girl, especially my first time well... it happened, I know this happened, and while I will not give up the power of words, the image might itself be priceless. Also when it comes to my mind, I enjoy learning, about myself and my interactions in the world; I suppose I am training to become a better me and such an eye will help in this. Know Thyself I am a stickler for the little things... no not those little things but how do I explain it, the feel of the wind, a pair of underwear on an ankle or left on the floor, the very temperature. In my play the details, the very environment makes a difference and should invoke all the senses of the players. It would be the way people want to the beautiful secretary in the office, the schoolgirl in the school, the in the car. You perchance know of my affinity for nature and so I speak of freedom, a primal aspect, and never was I closer to that then when I was in the woods. So I seek to change the paradigm in people, why seeking a sense of realism in the details... the good girl giving oral in the bathroom for example. I want hair ribbons wrapped around hands, panties sliding down ankles, and then for her to look up at me with those beautiful eyes and beg to be taken or released. You can draw many conclusions from this and not the obvious porn; setting the scene and without so much as a dildo, though I intend to use plenty of toys when my experience merits such changes Finally my porno watching didn't need instructions, I watch, I learn what I like, and in the end I dream to emulate but wait isn't my usual fair in terms of Hentai? For this I imagine the appetites of one the Marquis de Sade, and how his views on sexuality were thought to be... unconventional to say the least. Maybe in a way I have been desensitized to such madness but I find in quite appealing and as others studied the Kama Sutra, or learn from dungeon masters, I have my own methods to madness. I use porn like any other medium, books, normal movies, video games... as an escape, as a way to lose myself and my inhibitions and I simply want a girl to become lost with me, and in so doing we will discover each other. Reality seems such a bore sometimes in the aspect of humanity, but that's another story entirely and keep in mind I'm a virgin so what would I know. Anyway as frequency... porno almost daily, play... on hiatus |
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